“Then help me get her ass in the car. I’m taking my time with this one.”
My stomach roiled as the metallic taste in my mouth intensified.
Paul raised his gun. I couldn’t look away from the muzzle pointed straight at me. Memories flashed within the darkness of the barrel. Laughing as I sailed through the air after Holt threw me into the lake. The buzz beneath my skin the first time his lips touched mine. Holt holding me tightly as I let the tears flow when my parents had forgotten my birthday. Again. Planning that big, beautiful future that would be ours.
All my best moments had been with Holt. But I hadn’t had nearly enough.
I opened my mouth to scream. To beg. I wasn’t even sure which.
But I didn’t get the chance.
I heard a pop, like the sound of a single firecracker slicing through the air.
Heat bloomed in my chest. Then fire. And I was sliding down.
The tile was so cold, frigid compared to the inferno blazing in my torso. I wanted to sink into that coldness to escape the heat. But most of all, I wanted Holt.
“What the fuck?” Randy bellowed.
“She’s not worth getting arrested over, man. We gotta run!”
The ceiling above me melted into a cascade of colors, the pastels swirling together until it almost looked like my favorite time of day. Twilight. How many times had I made Holt sit with me past the sunset so that I could watch nighttime take hold? So the sky could soothe my soul.
I almost felt Holt’s lips pressed to my temple. “I’ll watch every twilight with you. Every moonrise, too.”
Footsteps pounded on the stairs. “Where the hell is Holt? We need them both.”
I tried to get my brain to place that voice. But I couldn’t quite…“Don’t worry, Cricket. I’ll scare the ghosts away.”
The twilight ceiling darkened, and the only thing I could think then was that I was glad Holt was late.
But I would’ve given anything to feel his arms around me one more time.
1
HOLT
PRESENT
Ten years.
I couldn’t help but circle the number in my head. Three thousand, six hundred, and fifty days. Yet I still knew these mountain passes like the back of my hand. The ones that got so packed with snow during the winter months they became impassible, the only ways in and out of town by air or taking the ferry to the opposite end of the lake, assuming things weren’t frozen.
The feeling of being mostly cut off from the world had always been something I’d relished. Cedar Ridge felt like a place the evil of the world hadn’t touched. We all knew better now. Evil was just better at hiding sometimes.
My gut tightened as I took the final curve that would deposit me across the border of the town limits, my Mercedes G63 hugging the road like a dream. On any other day, I would’ve gotten a thrill out of taking these mountain passes, testing my reflexes, and feeling that hit of adrenaline that reminded me I was still alive. But not today.
The bend in the road straightened, and I caught sight of the same sign I’d passed too many times to count.Welcome to CedarRidge. Population 2163.The number was higher than it had been ten years ago, and the appearances I’d made since leaving had always been by air—in and out as quickly as humanly possible.
Not tempting fate. No chance of seeing familiar faces other than my family. No risk of seeingher.
Memories slammed against the walls I’d erected in my mind, brick by painstaking brick. Blood. The feel of her thready pulse beneath my fingers. My palms desperately trying to shove life back into her chest.
The leather on the wheel creaked with audible protest as I reinforced those mental walls. Hell. I needed better defenses if I were cracking after only seconds.
Then again, maybe I didn’t. I deserved every painful memory that swirled and wreaked havoc on my brain.
I glanced at my dashboard clock. Eleven thirteen. My gaze shifted to my watch. Eleven fourteen.