“I felt that way every day after I got out of prison. Every day after my stepdad was sentenced, I drowned in that anger.”
“How did you stop it?”
“I needed an outlet. Somewhere to release it.”
A thoughtfulness spread over Aidan’s expression. “Like boxing or something?”
“Could be. For me, it was the horses. I couldn’t work with them with that anger coursing through me. I had to expel it before I set foot in a ring. I ran it out of myself with hard work: stocking hay, cleaning stalls, feeding, fixing fences. I let it flow through me while I did all those things. Then, by each afternoon, I was ready to work with the horses, and they gave me back a sliver of peace. That grew day by day until the anger wasn’t eating me alive anymore.”
“I don’t know what my outlet is. I like working with the horses, though.”
I gripped Aidan’s shoulder and squeezed. “You may need to try a few things on for size. We can get you signed up for a martial arts class. Maybe something creative, too, like art.”
Aidan made a face.
“Don’t knock it. I’ve seen some pretty badass art out there.”
“Maybe…” he said begrudgingly.
“And we keep working with the horses at the ranch. And, most of all, we talk. This stuff only has power over us when the shadows fester.”
“I don’t want to live in the dark anymore.”
I pulled Aidan into a tight hug. “You don’t have to. And even if things look murky, you just have to remember that you’re not alone. I’ve got your back. And that’s never going to change.”
Aidan let out a shuddering breath, and I knew he was trying to hold back tears. He pulled out of my hold. “Why would you want to help me?”
“Because I know what it feels like to feel powerless and out of control.” My mind flashed to Lor and the gift she’d given me with the horses. “Someone helped me find my way. I’d like to help you, too. But only if you want me to.” It had to be Aidan’s choice, or it would never work.
He looked up and met my gaze dead-on. “Out of the dark?”
I gripped his hand in a half shake. “Out of the dark.”
39
SHILOH
Hadley’s eyesnarrowed on me as I moved around the kitchen, cleaning up. “You’re glowing.”
I froze for the briefest of moments before continuing to load plates into the dishwasher. “Must be that new skincare regimen I’m on.”
She snorted. “Please. I can barely get you to use sunscreen.”
I bit back my smile as I continued with my task. “I’ve actually become partial to bubble baths lately.” But only when Ramsey was involved.
Hadley stared at me, blinking a few times. “Bubble baths?”
I shrugged. “They’re relaxing.”
“I know that, but you haven’t taken one since you were like seven.” She pinched my arm.
“Hey! What was that for?”
“Just checking to see if you’re real. I was beginning to wonder if you were some AI that had replaced my sister.”
I glared at her. “I’m very real, thank you very much. But if I were an AI, I’d take you out first for that pinch.”
Hadley didn’t laugh as I’d expected. “You were attacked yesterday, and this morning you were basically singing as you served brunch. You didn’t get annoyed when Mom startedprobing. You agreed to host a bridal shower for Everly with me. Who are you, and what have you done with my prickly but beloved sister?”