This timewhen I woke pressed against Boden on the couch, I fought back the rising panic. I didn’t let myself get pulled under the way I had last time. Instead, I simply breathed. I let myself feel Boden’s heat, the kiss of the flames that were at the core of his very being.
His hand trailed up and down my back, tracing a lazy, nonsensical design. “You freaking out on me?”
I shook my head against his chest. “You’re warm. Like my own personal space heater.”
Boden chuckled. “Not sure I’ve ever been called that before. I guess it comes in handy when the fire died out overnight.”
I burrowed deeper into his hold, giving myself a few more moments to revel in the feeling. More than warmth, it was safety, comfort, a sense of beingknownin a way I hadn’t felt in forever. “I don’t want to move.”
“Don’t.”
“I have to open the gallery in a little bit.”
Boden shifted so we were face-to-face and swept my hair out of my eyes. “Have breakfast with me first. I promise that even I can’t screw up cereal.”
My mouth curved as I searched those hazel eyes. I wasn’t even sure what I was looking for. Reassurance maybe? A certainty that was completely unfair to hope for? “What are my options?”
He beamed and shifted to stand, holding out a hand to me. “I’ve got some healthy thing that tastes like cardboard, and I’ve got Lucky Charms. What’ll it be?”
I arched a brow. “Do I look like an idiot to you?”
Boden chuckled and led me into the kitchen, not letting go until he reached for the box of Lucky Charms. I felt the loss instantly. That sensation sent a jolt through me. But I kept breathing. I focused on making coffee for myself and Boden.
“Cream? Sugar?” I asked as I poured the liquid into two mugs.
“Splash of half and half.”
I tipped the carton to Boden’s coffee, turning the dark substance a creamy brown. “It feels weird that I didn’t know how you like your coffee. I feel like we know each other better than that.” He’d held me all night. Been there when I needed him. I should know the daily minutia, too.
Boden took the mug from my hand. “I’d rather know the real stuff.”
“And that is?”
“What pulls you to make the art you do? You letting me into your world when you’re hurting. Giving me the grace to stumble like you did yesterday and finding our way afterwards.”
Warmth bloomed in my belly. Not a sexual heat but something even better. “It’s an authentic knowing.”
Boden dipped his spoon into his cereal. “Exactly.”
We covered the other side of the coin over breakfast. Favorite takeout. His was Thai. Mine was Italian. And dozens of other favorites. Movie growing up. Place he’d traveled to. Way to spend a rainy Sunday. The tiny little intimacies made me paint a fuller picture of the man across from me.
I glanced at the clock on the wall. “I really should go.”
“I’ve got these,” Boden said, taking our bowls as he stood. He paused for a moment, the sudden absence of that charming surety in his expression. “Can I pick you up after work? Dinner and a movie?”
I tamped down the panic that rose in me at that question. Because the truth was, I was powerless to say no. I wanted more time with Boden, even knowing he’d leave. “I get done at four.” Those flames reached out and licked my skin. But I couldn’t turn away. I needed more of these moments with Boden. Something that was only ours.
Before I could consider how unwise making plans with him was, I hurried into the bathroom to change into my clothes from the day before. I didn’t worry about pulling on the tights, simply went for the dress. I hated shrouding myself in black even a moment longer than necessary, but I didn’t want to get to the gallery in Boden’s sweatpants and t-shirt either.
When I walked out, Boden was giving the dogs treats.
“No wonder Gizmo’s always so happy to see you.”
Boden gave me a sheepish shrug. “I’m not above bribery.”
“Good to know.” I lifted Gizmo into my arms, ignoring the blooming pain in my back. “I’ll see you tonight.” My words came out awkwardly as if I weren’t sure how to say goodbye.
Boden had no such reservations. He pulled me into his arms and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Call me if you need me. Or if Jax shows up.”