That fractured sky. The rain that had given me the water I’d so desperately needed. After I’d been rescued and was in the hospital, I’d overheard the doctor talking to my parents. She’d said that she didn’t think I would’ve made it another twenty-four hours. And that was when I knew the truth: The sky had saved me.
And Everly. The daughter of the man who had taken me. She’d snuck out and ridden through the night to the sheriff’s station to help me make my way home. I’d never be able to repay her for what they’d given me—her or the sky. But now, Ev was a part of our family, something that would be official in a matter of months when she married Hayes.
I did what I could to show my gratitude. Helped her at the animal sanctuary she’d built on the land that had once been her family’s. Tried to say yes when she and Hayes invited me for dinner. It wasn’t much, but it was what I could give.
I had no way of repaying the sky. I tipped my face up to it, letting the sun warm my skin. I felt the vibrations of hooves against the ground but kept my eyes closed, soaking in the heat. A muzzle nosed my shoulder.
My hand found the mare’s cheek before I opened my eyes. Pulling off my hat, I dropped my head to hers, our foreheads touching. “Hey, Sky.”
She blew air out of her nostrils in greeting.
“How would you feel about a ride?”
I swore her eyes sparked in excitement, and I couldn’t help my smile. Hooking the lead rope to her halter, I started for the gate. “You’re gonna need a good groom.”
Sky looked as if she’d taken a roll in a patch of mud. Those patches were too plentiful to avoid this time of year. Spring in Wolf Gap could be unpredictable. You could have sun like this one day and snow the next. It made for mud city anywhere the snow or rain gathered. But that made Sky as happy as could be.
Movement caught my eye. My mom unhooked the gate and held it open for us. “Where are you two headed?”
I didn’t miss the lines of tension around her mouth as she asked. Most would’ve, but I’d become an expert in human behavior. In reading their movements and expressions. It was my first line of defense. I never wanted to miss the mean or unstable again.
That awareness was both a blessing and a curse. I felt safer, but I never missed just how much my kidnapping affected the people I loved. How much it weighed on their shoulders, even after all this time.
That familiar gnawing sensation took root in my belly, and I focused on the ground instead of my mother. “Just for a trail ride.”
Mom shut the gate behind Sky and me, latching it back into place. “Want some company?”
She always offered—every single time. My skin itched as if it were too tight for my body. “Maybe next time.”
My mom worried her bottom lip. “How long will you be gone?”
Annoyance flickered to life as my grip on the lead rope tightened. “Not sure.” I started walking towards the barn. If I didn’t move, the panic that came with the feeling of being hemmed in would grab hold. Even now, my fingers fluttered against my thigh. Stretching and flexing, then taking up a rapid tapping.
The staccato movement helped to keep things in check. I’d learned to hold tight to the things that helped. But the greatest balm for everything churning inside me was the thing I didn’t have nearly enough of—solitude.
“Did you have lunch?”
My mom’s voice cut through my swirling thoughts. I let out a breath as I kept walking. “In my saddlebags.”
Her gaze went sharp, and that telltale furrow appeared between her brows. “I don’t think you should be riding without eating. The sun’s bright today. You could faint. Fall off Sky, and we’d have no idea where you were.”
The movement of my fingers picked up its pace. I clenched and flexed my hand to keep from screaming. As if at twenty-seven years old, I didn’t know when I needed to eat. I knew hunger better than she ever would. Instead of biting her head off, though, I stayed quiet.
So often, silence was the best gift I could give my family. Biting my tongue and staying out of the way. Erasing the reminder of the thing that had marked each of them in such different ways.
“Shiloh—”
I cut her off by stepping into the barn.
“Hey, Mom.”
Hayes’ voice brought a wash of relief. Mom turned, focusing on her youngest son, and I hightailed it to the crossties. If I were quick, I might get out of here before she finished talking wedding plans with him.
I led Sky into the grooming space. The truth was, I didn’t even need the lead rope. She would’ve followed me anywhere. It was the kind of trust I knew I’d only ever have with animals. They didn’t have the same kind of agendas that humans did.
They also didn’t push for conversation. I hooked Sky to the crossties and bent to grab the curry comb from my grooming kit. I took the brush to her back, working at the worst of the mud. “Did you take a bath in it? This is ridiculous, even for you.”
She lifted her head up and down as if nodding, but it was just because she loved the sensation of the curry comb against her coat. It was like one of those little massagers that dug into all the right muscles.