“You put the word out to all area doctors and vets?”
Ruiz pulled his keys out of his pocket. “The phone tree has been activated. I promise, we’ve got it covered.”
“Thanks. I’m not trying to be an asshole—”
“You just don’t handle giving up control well.”
“Understatement of the century,” Hadley muttered.
Calder moved forward into the circle of people. “Cut your brother some slack, Hads.”
“He doesn’t need to be cut some slack. He needs to be more careful.”
“Okay,” Hayes said, holding up his good hand. “I’m fine. Let’s dial it back a notch.” He turned to Ruiz, Young, and Williams. “Hit the road. I’d like a brief every hour or so with any developments.”
Young gave him a mock salute. “You got it.” They headed through the cabin and towards their vehicles.
Hayes looked at the rest of us. “I need to get cleaned up, but it looks to me like we’ve got a feast to eat. Ev, you want to heat up our Mexican food?”
I forced a smile. “Mexican food and pizza. Can’t think of a better combination.”
Hayes’ arms wrapped around my waist from behind. “Leave the rest of the dishes. We can finish them tomorrow.”
“I just want to get it done tonight so it’s not hanging over my head. But you should go to bed. You’re probably exhausted.” I certainly was. It was the kind of tired that seeped into your bones. Not one from lack of sleep but from being worn down.
“I’m not going to bed without you.” He pulled back my hair so he could trail kisses along my neck.
I ducked out of his hold, moving to put two plates on a drying rack. “You can wait up if you want, but I’ll be a while. I need to look over some plans before our new arrivals get here this weekend.”
Hayes spun me around. “Talk to me. Don’t shut me out or blow me off—or whatever else you have in your head that you think will help push me away.”
“I’m not pushing you away.”
“Bullshit. You might as well have been a robot tonight.”
I’d thought I’d done a pretty good job of holding it together during our makeshift dinner party. Smiling and laughing when appropriate. Making polite conversation. But, apparently, that hadn’t been the case.
I gripped the counter behind me. The edge of the wood bit into my palms, but the little flicker of pain kept me grounded. “I’d never be able to forgive myself if something happened to you because of me. My family has already cost yours so much.”
“Enough with that already. How many times do we have to go over that the burden of that isn’t on you?”
“It might not be my fault, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still carry it with me. That I’m not marked by it. You can’t just erase it all, Hayes.”
He moved in close, the heat of his body pouring into mine. “I wish I could.” He placed a finger between my brows, that spot that always wrinkled when I was stressed or worried. “I wish I could take away every last bit of pain you experience. I’d give anything.”
“But you can’t. And you can’t ask me to pretend it doesn’t exist.”
Hayes wrapped his arms around me,
pulling me against him. “I know. I just wish you wouldn’t carry everyone else’s actions on your shoulders.”
“If this was Allen or Ian—”
“We don’t know that it was. This could be some sick stranger neither of us knows.”
“Or it could be my uncle or brother.”
He pressed his lips to my hair. “It wouldn’t change a thing about how I feel about you. You aren’t them. Just like you aren’t your father or uncle or mother. You’re Ev. And you make everyone’s lives better. It’s impossible not to fall in love with you.”