Lili tied to a bed, tortured; Lili taken over and over against her will; Lili told to keep quiet; Lili being burned; Lili scared and crying out, begging for someone to save her.
FUCK!
The demons scratch and draw blood now, wanting free.
*Eagar*Let us out! Let us out! We want to play!
The door, I can’t hold the door much longer, their claws are in too deep.
Her eyes lock with mine, that bottom lip of hers quivering, then her mask falls into place.Damn it, I’m too late. She is shutting down. I knew then I lost her.
I can’t fix this. She’s never going to forgive me.
*Demons spit*Never will you be good enough Zander. She doesn’t want someone as pathetic as you. You’re nothing but a sorry piece of work.
I’m screaming inside, the demons gaining strength. I’m so fucking tired. Ican’tdo this anymore.
Grady’s words won’t help me now, his notion of *Irish*‘no such thing as can’t’is nothing but afuckinglie.
It’s all over. I’ve lost. My sanity is next.
Here I am, I’ve done nothing to protect my siren, and have been oblivious to what secrets she has kept, how deep they truly go.
How has Lili kept herself so fucking strong? I would crumble, hell, it’s happening right before my eyes.
I want to take this all back. I’ll give her anything she desires, anything at all. I can’t do this without her.
Please Lili. *Broken whisper* I need you.
_CHAPTER 5 - LILI_
“I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life’s a bitch. You’ve got to go out and kick ass.” –Maya Angelou
Insight to our future is a fickle thing, but to dig into the past, dredge up the slew of pain, regret, and anguish.
It’s all too much to bear.
Why now?
Why is my tormenter doing this? What does he want? What is his endgame? He has taken so much from me already,why now?
I recall a time I questioned Isaac, something I regretted the second it left my lips.
*Monster* Because you’re mine, little flower. Have you forgotten this? You’re mine forever. No one else will ever have you.
I crave a Xanax,give me one, please, only one, I swear that is all I need to get me through. At least then I’d have a mindless fog of nothingness to hide behind. Alas, I have not a one with me. My thumb and forefinger tap in a constant rhythm of two and I can’t stop.
Stress is a frequent companion.
Shark mentioned there is one thing my stepfather had overlooked, or so it seemed. It’s the one thing no one would have expected someone to dig for and possibly use against me. The one thing that could make me a laughingstock. No one will want to collaborate with me. My art career would be forever tarnished.
I can’t even voice it. It’s right there, mocking me from within the pages.
Here I sit on the sofa, muscles tense, hands balled into fists as I glare at the three Marines.
I must be strong.
Alexander cannot see the truth uncovered in this file, the one I’m currently sitting on. I’m not moving from this spot, nor am I handing it over to Shark. They have no business learning of my misdeeds and tortured events. I want to be the one who informs Alexander.