“Do you want me to stop?” he whispered as my legs tried to clamp around his hips, feeling the strangeness of hard man against the soft yielding of me.
I paused, biting my lip, staring at the ceiling with a chest full of icicles and dread.
Did I want him to stop?
Not really.
Did I want him to hurry?
Yes.
Pulling his head back down to mine, I kissed him with heat and demand. “I want you to finish this.”
His eyebrows knitted together as if I’d hurt him, but his lips sought mine again as his hand wrapped around my hipbone. “I should do this in a bed for your first time.” His other hand disappeared between us, guiding the tip of him to my entrance.
I stiffened as the first press of him warned that this wasn’t a joke.
This was happening.
“I don’t care.”
I was about to lose every shred of innocence I had left to a boy I didn’t know his name.
“Wait.” I pushed at his shoulders.
He gritted his teeth but didn’t try to enter me. “You changed your mind?”
Resting my hands on his ass, I pulled him into me, making his eyes widen and mouth pop wide. As he sank into me, I shook my head. “No. But I want to know your name.”
He groaned as his length slid inside me, then hit an obstruction that pinched and burned.
He looked at me, looked through me, looked right into the person I was and said, “My name is David.”
David.
Della and David.
It had a nice ring to it.
We poised on the point of no return, his elbows jamming into the floor beside my ears, holding himself above me. “Do you want me to finish, Della Ribbon?”
My heart gave one massive kick of denial before I nodded. “Yes…”
And the rest is history.
He thrust inside, tore apart my virginity, and tried to be as gentle as he could. All the while, tears leaked from my eyes, and I kissed him with a ferocity that ended up with us rolling around on the floor as I fought him for power.
I wanted him to pin me down and take everything I had to give. Instead, he let me manipulate him. He allowed me to roll him onto his back and ride him on top, not caring that my insides hurt or the pleasure in my blood was mixed up, screwed up, and so far away from heaven that it sent me plummeting to hell where I surely deserved to live.
It lasted longer than I thought it would.
His thrusting sent ripples through me, his harsh breathing and tattered groans made me feel powerful and wanted, but when his pace increased and his fingers tightened and his kisses deepened, I didn’t leap into the void with him.
He came.
I didn’t.
He kissed me.
I kissed him back.
And then my cell phone rang, putting a full stop on one of the strangest paragraphs of my life.
Funny how Ren knew the exact moment to call. Almost as if he had some sixth sense telling him what I’d just done.
I ignored it.
Most of the time, I got home before Ren even noticed I was missing.
But not that night.
Unfortunately, or fortunately—depending on how you look at it—he caught me on the worst one, ringing me again, just as I was wiping a Kleenex between my legs and marvelling at the smear of blood.
Once again, I let it ring as I exited the bathroom attached to the bedroom where I’d lost my virginity and padded barefoot to David.
He pulled me into his arms, kissing my temple and hugging me close. “I’m sorry I wasn’t who you wanted.”
I kissed his chest before letting him go to put his t-shirt on. “You were the best person for me to lose it with. I’m glad it was you.”
He smiled. “Well, I’m honoured.” Buckling his jeans, he stood awkwardly by the door as I rearranged my dress. “Do you want to…eh, stay in touch?”
My heart fluttered at the way he looked at me. At the fascinated puppy dog crush that no doubt made him feel all protective and smitten with a girl who begged for sex in such a sad, pathetic way.
I smiled, picking my beaded bag off the floor and stuffing the two unused condoms inside. “It’s fine. I knew what I was doing. You don’t have to worry about me.”
My phone danced around again, chirping its annoying little chirp.
“Are you going to get that?” he asked.
“Why? It only hurts.”
He held open the door for me to exit the room. “Want me to talk to him?”
I laughed. “That would be interesting.”
The chirping grew louder, and I sighed. “He’ll be concerned about me.”
“In that case, you better answer it.” Tucking a curl behind my ear, he murmured, “Come find me after. We’ll have a drink. Get to know each other a little.”
The fact that he liked me enough to want to hang out even though he’d already gotten me into bed made me warmer than I’d been in a while. “Sure.”