My arms tightened around myself.
Is that a crime?
I didn’t know why I antagonised him. If he hadn’t hurt me yet, why push and push, waiting for him to do the exact thing I didn’t want him to do?
What would a psychologist say? What would my mother?
It didn’t matter that I was raised with the matters of the mind. Sorting out another’s issues was easy, guessing their concerns wasn’t nearly as hard as diagnosing my own.
Elder looked me up and down. “I’m fully aware that your tongue isn’t healed and speech is still impossible. But you could give me what you gave Michaels.”
My legs jerked, causing one of my feet to slip off the bollard.
He’d told Elder I nodded for him? What happened to patient confidentiality?
“He didn’t tell me what you discussed or even how you communicated. He just said you answered his questions.” He rubbed his head again, dispelling another shower of sea. “I want to know how you answered him and why you won’t answer me.”
My shoulders hunched even as my swollen tongue itched. I’d done what Michaels had asked of me. After he’d gone, I’d eaten every mouthful of soup and bite of fluffy rice that a friendly faced maid had brought in.
I even sucked down a berry and banana smoothie and forced my very full stomach to tolerate the chocolate mousse. So much food. Much of it too sweet. But the range of savoury, sweet, and starch did wonders for my depleted system.
Within an hour, I didn’t feel so jittery or teary-eyed. My sad confusion faded, leaving curiosity in its wake. Hence my hesitant exploration and expedition onto the deck of Elder’s prized yacht.
“Pimlico.” His growl echoed in the night. “I asked a question. Answer me.”
My nostrils flared.
It didn’t work like that. Michaels had found me at my weakest. He’d been kind to me, and I respected that kindness. It wasn’t a weakness to answer him.
A curse fell from Elder’s lips. “I’d hoped not to see you again until your tongue was healed. Do you know why?” His gaze shot me with ebony arrows.
That question demanded a yes or no answer, but still, I remained mute.
“Because,” he snarled, “if I knew your tongue was better, I would force you to speak. You expect me to hurt you? Well, perhaps I will if it means you’ll finally tell me what I want.”
You do, and it will make you just like him.
I bared my teeth, showing more emotion than I meant.
You do, and I’ll clamp up and never utter a word to you.
He sighed, his face softening. “That would make me just like him, wouldn’t it?”
I breathed hard as he battled for calmness.
“And then I wouldn’t deserve your voice.” Pushing off the rail, he came closer. The moon shone behind him, etching him in silver silhouette. “Fine, silent mouse. Keep your quietness a little longer; let me prove to you I do deserve your voice.”
Ever so slowly, he took my hand, pulling it away from my knee with a sharp tug. I couldn’t fight him, even though I tried.
My suspicions about his intentions flared. Was this the first point of initiation? Did he hate that I’d trespassed on his time out here and would make me pay for it?
Only, his fingers slipped through mine—cool and slightly sticky from sea water. “This isn’t working…for either of us.”
I sucked my bottom lip as he curled his hand tighter, holding it like any normal introduction—like the introduction I’d refused when Alrik had ordered me to shake his hand.
“I think we should start again, don’t you?” His fingers tightened around mine, activating the warmth inside me into a scalding heat. “I think you should stop doubting me. Learn to know me with no judgment clouding your mind.”
I tugged, but he didn’t let me go.
“In return, I’ll give you the time you need. I won’t force you. And I won’t get angry when you deny me my answers.” His lips pulled into half a smile. “For a short while, at least.”
Our hands grew hot, searing together the longer we touched. Fire licked down my arm, tickling and foreign, hissing through my spine and into my already hot belly.
“Do we have a deal?”
Just like the decision to nod for Michaels was hard, this was even harder.
Harder because there was no going back from this. It wasn’t just a nod but an oath to trust him, and I hadn’t trusted anyone in so long. Those I had trusted turned out to hurt me the most.
Don’t fear the future.
Only endure the present.
Michaels’ wisdom was what made me squeeze his hand in return and very reluctantly nod.
Elder sucked in a breath, a sinful smile on his face. “Thank you. For finally agreeing to give me a chance.”
Memories of him coming back for me, of his livid anger at my bleeding tongue, and tender strength as he carried me out of hell wrenched through my doubt.