"So why get married?"
"Things weren't how they are now. Being a single mom was frowned upon." She looks at me as though I should know this. “I honestly didn’t have the courage to go against your grandparents, it was hard. I had four adults telling me that I had to marry your father. Your father wanted to marry me too, he believed it was best for everyone involved if we did.” She shakes her head furiously, almost if she’s trying to get a memory out of her mind. Suddenly a smile forms on her face. “Your dad, he was so happy that we were pregnant, he couldn’t wait to be a dad.”
I smile, “He was the best dad.”
“That he was, he would talk to my bump every day. He’d tell you all about his day as we got into bed, once he was finished, he’d kiss the bump.”
I laugh, “He did that up until he died. He’d always tell me about his day, and every night before bed, he’d kiss the top of my head.” I took it for granted. I miss those moments so much. I wish I could have one more kiss on the head.
“He was a good man, he deserved better than the marriage we had.” She tells me softly, her eyes swimming with tears.
“Where would you have gone traveling?” It’s one thing I never knew Mom wanted to do.
“Asia, it’s someplace I’ve always wanted to go. I’d love to see the culture firsthand. If I had the time or the money, I would have gone to Europe after. Ideally, I would have loved to travel the world. Meet new people and see new things but it was never meant to be. Instead, I got pregnant and married your father.” She doesn’t sound sad about it, just resigned.
Maybe Harrison can take her traveling, she seems really happy with him, and that could be something they do together and create lasting memories? "Do you regret it?"
She doesn’t even think about her answer, she opens her mouth and the words spew out. "Yes, I had so many plans. I wanted to see the world and have fun. It was something I had dreamed of for so long, but I couldn't do that while I was pregnant nor while you were growing up. Not only that, I was married to a man I didn’t love for a long time. Everything I wanted vanished in the blink of an eye."
My breath catches, and I try everything in my power to try and breathe normally. The pain of her words hits me hard. Wow. just wow. I stand up, "I didn't mean did you regret having me, Mom. Geez, I meant did you regret marrying Dad. But at least I know where I stand now."
"Mia, I didn't mean it like that."
I shake my head, "Whatever, I'm going out. I'll see you later."
Stepping out of the living room, Lacey’s standing there with such sadness in her eyes. "How much did you hear?" I ask her.
Her cheeks flame as she ducks her head. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. Are you okay?"
She scoffs, "You're seriously asking if I'm okay? Mia, I just heard what your mom said to you, are you okay?"
No, I'm not okay, but what can I do about it? "I'm okay, shall we go?" I need to get out of here, I really want to see Hudson, to have his arms wrap around me and just hold me, but I don't have his number, so I have no way of getting in contact with him.
She gives me a weird look but doesn't comment. Instead, she nods.
"Okay, let me run and grab my purse. If you're ready, you can meet me in the car?" I tell her as I place my hand on the banister of the stairs.
She links her arm through mine, "I need to get my cell phone. My mom told me she'll let me know if there's any news."
Lacey and I sit in front of the laptop, making sure that both of us are able to be seen. "What's wrong, Mia?" Sarah asks as soon as she answers, her eyes narrowing as she looks between Lacey and I. She looks good today, less stressed.
Lacey and I drove around for hours, we went for lunch and drove around for a while longer, neither of us in a hurry to come back here, as soon as we did, we rushed upstairs and called Sarah. I'm doing everything in my power to keep away from Mom. I'm still hurting over her words, I understand that she didn't mean it to come out quite the way it did, but the sentiment was there. That's what hurts.
"Hey, I wanted to find out what happened with you and Jagger? So spill, I've been on tenterhooks all day waiting to call you." I smile, mad at myself for making her worry, she has enough stress as it is.
Her eyes light up, "He emailed me last night, I was so shocked. He told me that my email was the first time he knew of me being pregnant."
"We know that, so what happened?" Lacey's impatience shining through.
Sarah laughs, "Yeah, so I found him on Facebook and Facetimed him. I needed to see his face when he told me. I believe him, do you?" She's so unsure of herself.
"Yeah, I believe him. Sarah, there's no way he's lying." I tell her honestly, as I remember his face when I told him about Allie.
Relief shines brightly in her eyes. "He's already called today, twice. Allie smiled when she heard his voice. It was the strangest
thing but also the cutest."