“Strike, block, strike, cadet,” she commanded and I imagined an air of menace colouring her voice.
This is it, I think. The memory of Keel’s look of concern replays in my head, along with the silence of the group at lunch. They lulled me into a false sense of security, got me up here away from Miazydar. She’s going to do the government’s job for them like any soldier would. She’s going to kill me.
“Strike, block, strike,” she said, doing just that. It forced me to scramble away. My heel connected with one of Hunderly’s spines, and I dodged Keya’s swipe to my head before jerking my eyes over my shoulder, but by the time I’d dislodged my foot she was on me again. “Your weapon’s no good to you if you don’t use it,”
she said, striking again. I snapped my head sideways to avoid the smooth metal blade. It wasn’t enough, the blow sending shockwaves through my skull despite the helmet, but I didn’t have time to dwell. She no longer followed her proscribed pattern, shifting along the dragon’s back with practised ease, spinning her spear before bringing the butt up, arrowing in for my chin. My fingers immediately tightened on my weapon, bringing the shaft up to block a blow that would knock me out or off this dragon.
I was only partially successful. My stance wasn’t strong and neither was my grip so the butt and my lance collided, smacking into the base of my helmet. It thankfully muted the ferocity of the blow but it was enough. Everything went hazy as my head snapped back, the momentum, added to by the weight of the helmet, threw me backwards. My arms and legs flail madly, everything a blur. My scream rang through the comms unit.
I land hard. I shake my head, the wrench of the helmet making my muscles cry out as I do so. “Keel…” I whimper into the internal microphone, “Alden.”
“Don’t go expecting the white knights to ride in and save you,” Keya says and she flicked on the plasma blade. Even through the howl of the wind, I could hear its high-pitched whine. “Get up, cadet.”
“Why? So you can fucking kill me? Seems to me the safest place is lying against your dragon. You don’t want to risk hurting him.”
I hear her low chuckle. “Some good strategic thinking there, but you don’t realise I could use this to perform surgery if I needed to, I’m that damn precise. And anyway, Hunderly won’t suffer a coward clinging to his hide. Get up, or I’ll make you get up.”
Based on my experience in Damorica, this would be the time when I reach down deep inside myself and somehow the fighting skills I’d accrued over all those years of Battle Club would come together and I would put Captain Keya and her dragon cutting plasma spear on her arse. That wasn’t what happened. Instead, my weapon fell over the side, spinning in the air as it plummeted to the earth, a foreshadowing of what would happen to me. I kept my mental link with Miazydar tightly locked down. I didn’t want him getting embroiled in this. I had no idea if he could successfully attack Hunderly or what Keya would do with that bloody spear if he did. I shook my head, instantly regretting this as my head swam. Keya moved so that she loomed over me. She raised her weapon slowly, the blazing point trained on me, pulling back gradually until her elbow was raised high in the air. I struggled to claw myself away, but I’d run out of room. My head hit the hard ridge of spikes that protect Hunderly’s head from attackers. I couldn’t see Keya’s face and am forced instead to stare into the implacable shining black surface of her visor. “Tick, tock, cadet,” she said, her voice a low rumble in my ear. “What’ll it be?”
My chest hurt as I got to my feet, knowing what I had to do. I didn’t like it, I’m going to give a massive gift to every bastard here: me dead. I’m a speed bump, an obstacle, something to be removed and nothing I’d done had stopped that. She sucked me in with the exercises on the dummy, flattered my ego, telling me I was catching on so quickly. Like a dumb fish, I swallowed the bait, hook, line and sinker and all I could do was take control of the outcome. The dragon, the wind, pushed me around but I felt curiously light, now I knew what had to happen. “Cadet?” Keya said as I edged towards the side of the dragon’s neck. Maybe she wanted the satisfaction of striking the blow herself, but she wasn’t having it. I closed my eyes, not wanting her to be the last thing I saw. I threw myself backwards, gravity instantly yanking me down, down, my limbs flailing in the air, clawing at it for handholds that would never be there. I knew it would be soon, so I let my link with my dragon open. Miazydar, I love you.
Something smashed into my body, but it wasn’t the ground. My eyes jerked open and I saw the underside of a dragon, watching their wings pump as they gained altitude. “You OK?” I heard with a crackle through the comms unit.
“Keel?”
“Yeah, that first swan dive’s a killer, but we’ve all had to do it. What did Keya do? Push you off or knock you unconscious? I had to be pried off the back of my old CO’s dragon, crying like a drowning kitten and dropped off the side. Wet my new flying suit through, I don’t mind saying.”
“What?”
What the hells been happening? I’m coming now, Miazydar said.
“The swan dive. All dragon riders have to master it. It’s one of the fundamental parts of being a rider. You have to learn to trust your fellow riders, that they’ll have your back and see you safe. Otherwise, you’re severely limiting your efficacy as a warrior. You have to be able to fight fearlessly in an environment no other soldier would fight in. You can’t teach or prepare for a swan dive. No one can be talked into jumping off the back of a dragon, especially a recruit as raw as yourself. You just have to be in a situation with no other choice.”
“This was deliberate?”
Keel doesn’t get a chance to reply, Miazydar appearing in the air before us. He trumpets his anger at Keel’s dragon and then dives in, claws outstretched for me.
Miazydar! It’s OK, Keel’s dragon caught me!
My legs shake when my feet finally touch the ground, so much so I ended up on my knees not long afterwards. I jerked my helmet off and dropped it.
“Tess, are you —.” Keel didn’t get to ask his question, Miazydar landing beside me moments later, curling his body around mine and letting out a defensive hiss when the rider didn’t back the fuck up.
Tess, are you… what happened?
Miazydar, I can’t, not yet. I lay my head against the warmth of his scales and closed my eyes, for a moment just focussing on the sound of him breathing in and out. He stiffened when a noisy crowd drew near, shifting into a more aggressive stance without dislodging me, no mean feat. People got louder and louder as they got closer, forcing me to open my eyes.
Alden, Vella and the rest of the dragon riders, cadets or soldiers, are toting a big wooden tub, singing some god awful song off-key. “C’mon cadet, time for your baptism,” Keya says, helmet off, her face now looking open and friendly. I frowned, not willing to move beyond the harbour of Miazydar’s body, unable to process the grins on their faces. When I didn’t respond Keya came closer, placing a hand on my shoulder despite M’s rumble of a growl. I marvelled at her poise, that she could so blithely ignore a massive animal well equipped to kill her in seconds. “C’mon,” she said much more gently, “it’s traumatic, I know, but the ritual helps. This is a transition from being a civilian to a rider. No matter what your relationship with your beast is, you can’t truly call yourself one of us until you’ve thrown yourself off a dragon’s back. C’mon.”
I’m steered, cajoled like a small child until I stood clear enough of Miazydar that they could pour the tub of beer over my head. I remained perfectly still as they did so, it stung my eyes and filled my nose with a yeasty sour stink. I wiped my face and smoothed my hair, wringing it from my ponytail. Everyone whooped and called out congratulations. I couldn’t determine one voice from another. They just became one multi-throated animal, warbling about something I’ll never understand until they get sick of this and then decamp to under a tree where drinks are freely distributed.
I just want to go home.
“Don’t go,” Keel said in a low voice as if hearing my internal monologue. “I get you’re not feeling it right now, but trust me, this is as much a part of the ritual as the jump. Have a drink or two. I wouldn’t normally push alcohol, but in this instance it strips out the adrenalin and lets you process what happened.”
I let him escort me over to the group, thankful when we took a spot towards the edge. Miazydar reduced in size, sitting on my shoulder and curling his tail around my neck. “Well, I’d like to toast our newest recruit, Tess,” Keya said, getting to her feet. “I’ve had to wrench, prise every bloody finger off and outright boot recruits as they sob like babies to get them to take the dive, but there was none of that today. Like a true rider, she saw she was in a position of weakness and rather than surrender, she made the jump. To Tess!”
Everyone raised their bottles and cheered, even me, if belatedly. The drink tasted a bit like an alcopop, sweet but with a harsh burn at the end. I drank one down quickly which got me another couple of whoops. Seriously, I was about to punch someone’s teeth down their throat to stop the goddamned noise. Keel watched me pop the lid of the next one and drink that down as well without comment. Finally, I placed the empty bottle on the grass beside me and stared down at it.