“I watched them stitch her up, Ryle. Wake the fuck up, man. You were a horrible husband.”
He stares at me for a beat, then says, “What has you convinced you’ll be any better?”
“Treating Lily the way she deserves to be treated is the easiest part of my life. I think you should be relieved she’s with someone like me.”
He laughs. “Relieved? I should berelieved?” He takes several steps toward me, his anger ascending again. “You’rethe reason we aren’t together!”
It takes everything in me to remain on these steps, and every ounce of patience I have not to return his shouts with my own. “You’rethe reason you aren’t together. It wasyouranger andyourfists that got you here. I was barely an acquaintance in Lily’s life when she was with you, so do the mature thing and stop blaming me, and Lily, and everyone else for your actions.” I stand up, but not to hit him. I just need to make room in my chest to exhale because if I don’t, I’m not sure how much longer I can do this without raising my voice to his level. It’s hard looking at him and remaining composed, knowing what he’s done to Lily. “Dammit,” I mutter. “This is ridiculous.”
Ryle and I are both quiet for a moment. Maybe he cantell I’m at my limit because I’m not keeping my frustration as under control anymore. I spin and face him, looking at him pleadingly. “This is our life now. Yours, mine, Lily’s,your daughter’s. We have to deal with this. Forever. Holidays, birthdays, graduations, Emerson’s wedding. All these things are going to be difficult for you, but you’re the only one who can make sure they aren’t difficult for the rest of us, too. Because none of us owes you our happiness.EspeciallyLily.”
Ryle shakes his head. He paces like he’s trying to erase the asphalt and uncover earth. “You expect me to what—to cheer you two on? To wish you well? To encourage you to be a good father tomyfucking daughter?” He laughs at the absurdity he finds in the idea of that, but I keep a very straight face.
“Yes.Exactlythat.”
I think my response throws him off. He pauses and threads his hands at the nape of his neck.
I take a step closer to him, but not in a threatening way. I don’t want to yell. I want Ryle to hear the absolute sincerity in my voice. “As happy as I know I can make Lily, she’ll never be fully happy until she has your acceptance and cooperation. And you’re making it difficult, even though you know she deserves a good life. They both do. If you want your daughter to grow up with the best version of Lily, then please work with her. This is possible for all of us.”
Ryle rolls his neck. “What are we, some kind ofteamnow?”
I hate that he’s trying to make any of this sound beyond the realm of possibility. “A team is theonlything people should be when kids are involved.”
That hits him. I can see it in the way he flinches, and then subtly swallows. He turns around and faces away fromme, taking a few steps while he contemplates everything I’ve said. When he turns back around and looks at me, there’s a little less vitriol there.
“When things don’t work out between the two of you and Lily needs somewhere to run, I’m not picking up the pieces this time.” With that, Ryle walks away. He doesn’t go through the restaurant this time. He heads down the alley, toward the street.
I can do nothing but stare at him with pity as he walks away. He truly doesn’t know Lily at all.
At all.
Lily doesn’trunto people. She didn’t run after me when I left Maine. She didn’t runtome when she left Ryle. She focused on being a mother. Yet that’s what he expects her to do if things don’t work out between us?Runto him like he’s her home base?
Lily’s home base is Emerson, and if he still can’t see that, he’s clueless.
If Lily had stayed with him, he would have spent the rest of their lives inventing issues in order to justify his excessive anger. Because I was never an issue in their marriage, and I never would have been.
I thought I pitied him before, but he’s fighting for a woman he barely even knows, which means he’s just fighting for the sake of fighting. He’s got a very similar personality to my mother, and sometimes there’s no fixing that. You just have to learn to live your life around it.
Maybe that’s what Lily and I are going to have to do. Learn to live our lives the best we can while occasionally having to deal with the ridiculous wrath of Ryle.
That’s fine. I’d go through this shit every day if it means I’m the one who gets to fall asleep next to her every night.
I walk up the steps and return to the hustle of the kitchen, and I get right back to work like he was never even here. I don’t know if my response tonight made this situation better, but I definitely don’t think I made it worse.
Darin hands me a wet rag. “You’re bleeding.” He points to the left side of my mouth, so I hold the rag there. “Was that her ex?”
“Yeah.”
“Everything okay now?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. He might get mad and come back. Hell, this could go on for years.” I look at Darin and smile. “But she’s worth it.”
Three hours later, I’m knocking softly on Lily’s apartment door. I texted her to let her know I was coming. I thought she might need another drive-by hug.
When she opens her door, it’s clear that’s exactly what she needs. And whatIneed. As soon as we’re inside her living room, she slips her arms around my waist and I fold myself around her. We remain embraced for a couple of minutes.
When she lifts her face, her eyebrows draw apart when she sees the small cut on my lip. “He’s such an immature asshole. Did you put ice on it?”