Beez held up a hand. “I know, and you don’t have to say another word. If I were in your shoes, I would’ve thought the same thing.” He got up from the bed and walked toward the window. Alcy joined him. Beez stared at Carter. “It’s just…” He lowered his voice. “I’m not used to this, you know? Every other assignment was get in, get off, get out. This one? It’s messing with my head, because I…” He expelled a long breath.
“You worry?”
Beez nodded. “This is something outside of my expertise. Sex can’t make him feel better.”
“Says who?” Carter croaked from across the room.
“Hey. Less talk, more soup,” Beez growled. Carter gave another eye-roll, and Beez grinned. “See? You’re feeling better already.”
Carter dropped the spoon into the bowl. “Actually? I can’t eat anymore right now. Could I maybe have it after a nap?”
Beez was at his side in a heartbeat. He lifted the tray from Carter’s lap, put it on the nightstand again, then helped Carter ease down under the sheets. “That’s right. You get some sleep.” Carter closed his eyes, and in less than a minute his breathing became slower, more regular.
Beez sat on the bed, gazing fondly at him. “As much as I would love for sex to cure all his ills—and believe me, everything in me is sayingtry itbecause it’s the only thing I know how to do—I don’t want to hurt him.”
In all the centuries that Alcy had known him, he’d never seen Beez like this.What’s different about him?Then the answer smacked him right in the face. “You care for him,” he said quietly.
“I shouldn’t. It goes against everything I know, everything I’m supposed to be.” Beez frowned. “Emotions? They aren’t supposed to come into it. My job is sex and partying, that’s all. Nothing else.”
Alcy stroked Beez’s arm. “Except it isn’t now, is it?”
Beez gazed at him with a pained stare. “How do humans do this?” He ran a hand over his head. “I mean, hookups are one thing, but actually havingfeelingsfor another person? To get that ache when they’re sad, to have your stomach flutter when they smile? What the hell is that all about?”
Alcy walked around the bed and stood behind Beez, rubbing his shoulders. “That, my dear Beez, is the beginning.”
“Of what?”
“Of learning to care more for someone than you do yourself.”
“Well, it’s wrong and I don’t like it.” Beez tilted his head upward, and pouted. “How do I get rid of this feeling?”
“You don’t. You nurture it, tend it like you would a garden, encouraging it to grow. And one day, hopefully, it might blossom into love.”
“Love is for suckers,” Beez stated in a flat tone.
Alcy huffed. “Spoken like a man who’s never felt it before.” He sat beside Beez.
“What about you? Have you ever been in love?”
Alcy’s cheeks warmed, and he was thankful Beez was looking in Carter’s direction. “There was a time I thought I was, but it was wishful thinking.”
“Oh? Why’s that?”
“Because the person was unavailable emotionally and physically. I rarely saw him, but when I did, those feelings came back stronger than before.”
Like they are now.
“Hm. I’m not one to give anyone relationship advice, but if you like a person, you should tell them.”
Alcy’s heart pounded. “I’m a host. It wouldn’t work.”
“At least you don’t have feelings for…” He tilted his head toward Carter. “Youknow.”
Don’t say it.Such an admission would come back and bite him, of that he was certain. And Beez would never let it go.Don’t say it.
Alcy ignored that niggling inner voice. “I can’t say that, because it wouldn’t be true.”
Beez turned, his eyes wide. “Oh? You’re developing feelings for him too?”