"It was her boyfriend?" I remembered the conversation at the table and Cam's sudden interest in who she was talking to made sense.
A muscle popped in his jaw as he nodded. "The little fuck had been hitting her. He was smart about it, doing it in places that weren't so easily noticeable. She stayed with him. I didn't know why at first. Come to find out that she was too scared of him to break up."
Cam stood suddenly, and my gaze followed him. He went to the window, parting the curtains. "Who knows how long it would've continued if Mom hadn't walked in when she did. Would Teresa have finally told someone? Or would that bastard just kept hitting her one night and killed her?"
Emotion crawled up my throat as I sucked my lower lip between my teeth.
"God, I was so pissed, Avery. I wanted to kill the fuck. He was beating up my sister and my dad wanted to call the police, but what were they really going to do? Both of them were minors. He'd get his hands slapped and get counseling, whatever. And that's bullshit. I wasn't okay with that. I left Thanksgiving night and I found him. Didn't take much, fucking small town and all. I knocked on his door and he came right out. I told him he couldn't come around my sister anymore and you know what that little punk did?"
"What?" I whispered.
"He got all up in my face, puffing his fucking chest at me. Told me he would do whatever the fuck he wanted." Cam barked out a quick, harsh laugh. "I lost it. Angry isn't even the word to use. I was enraged. I hit him and I didn't stop." He turned around, but he wasn't really seeing me. "I didn't stop hitting him. Not when his parents came out or his mom starting screaming. It took two police officers to get me off him."
Oh my God, I didn't know what to say. As I watched him sit in the moon chair, I couldn't imagine him hitting someone and not stopping. Not even after seeing how angry he'd been at the guy at Jase's party.
Cam rubbed his cheeks again. "I ended up in jail and he ended up in a coma."
My mouth dropped open before I could stop my reaction.
He looked away, lowering his chin. "I'd been in fights before-normal shit. But nothing like that. My knuckles were busted wide open and I didn't even feel it." He shook his head. "My dad… he worked his magic. I should've gone away for a long time for that, but I didn't. Guess it helped that the kid woke up a few days later."
With every passing second, my muscles locked up, one after another.
"I got off easy-not even a night in jail." Cam smiled, but there was no warmth to it. "But I couldn't leave home for several months while it got worked out. I ended up with a year's worth of community service at the local boys' club and then another year's worth of anger management. That's what I do every Friday. My last session is in the fall. My family had to pay restitution and you don't even want to know how much that cost. I had to stop playing soccer because of the community service gig, but… like I said, I got off easy."
He had gotten off easy.
Just like Blaine had gotten off easy.
No. I stopped myself right there. These were two different situations-Blaine was a rapist and Cam had beaten the guy who'd beat his sister. What Cam had done was wrong. Violence should never be the answer to violence, but the guy had hurt his sister.
"I understand," I said, and I realized that even though their situation was similar in a way, it was vastly different. And I was shocked myself. The old me-all she would've been able to think about was how both had gotten off because of who they were, who their parents were, and money. But I wasn't her anymore. And sometimes good people did bad things.
His head swung to me. "What?"
"I understand why you did it."
Cam stood. "Avery-"
"I don't know what it says about me, but you were defending your sister and beating the crap out someone isn't the answer, but she's your sister and…" And if I had a brother and he'd reacted that way after what happened to me? Well, he would have been my hero, as terrible as that was. "There are some people who deserve an ass kicking."
He stared at me.
I unfolded my legs. "And there are probably some people who don't even deserve to breathe. It's a sick and sad thing to say, but it's true. The guy could've killed your sister. Hell, he could have beaten some other girl to death."
Cam continued to stare at me like I'd sprouted a second nose. "I deserve to be in jail, Avery. I almost killed him."
"But you didn't."
He didn't say anything.
"Let me ask you a question. Would you do it again?"
Several seconds passed and then he said, "I still would've drove to his house and I would've hit him. Maybe not as badly, but honestly, I don't think it would've changed anything. The bastard beat my sister."
I took a deep breath. "I don't blame you."
"You're…"
I shrugged. "Twisted?"
"No." A real smile broke the tension in his face. "You're remarkable."
"I wouldn't go that far."
"Seriously," he said, coming to the couch. He sat beside me. "I thought you would be disgusted or angry if you knew."
I shook my head.
Cam dropped his forehead to mine and he clasped my cheeks gently. His eyes searched mine. "It feels good getting that off my chest. I don't want there to be secrets between us."
I smiled as he leaned forward, kissing the corner of my lips, but I barely felt the touch . Cam settled back, pulling me against his chest. I snuggled closer, but coldness still seeped deep into my bones. He'd shared this major secret with me, even though he'd feared I would judge him somehow, and I had remained quiet, keeping my secrets close to my heart. That wasn't fair, and I couldn't shake this terrible premonition that it would somehow come back around.
How can you live with yourself?
Cam kissed the top of my head, and my breath caught
I wasn't sure how I did.
######
Chapter 28
I hadn't really noticed it till then, but there had been a stress that Cam carried with him; the weight of keeping a secret he thought would destroy something he cared about. How I hadn't recognized it before was beyond me.
But it was good now… mostly.
Part of me suspected that one of the reasons why he'd finally told me was because he didn't believe what I said about the text. That maybe he hoped by opening up with me that I'd do the same.
I wished that was the case, but my secret would destroy what I cherished most.
Us.
But since it was Valentine's Day, I refused to think about it. I was having the most perfect day and I wasn't going to ruin it.
Cam had shown up at my door in the morning with a single red rose and with one after every single one of my classes. By the afternoon, I had half a dozen, which turned into two dozen when he arrived at my apartment that evening. I hadn't been sure of our plans, so I was relieved to see him in jeans and a sweater and nothing fancy. It was late, after nine, since Valentine's fell on a Friday, and I wasn't sure if we were even going out.
Thanking his for the rose, I took them into the kitchen and added them to the vase. He remained by the door. "What are you doing?" I asked.
His grin was mischievous. "Stay right where you are and close your eyes."
"I have to close my eyes?"
"Yep."
I arched a brow as I tried to hide my burgeoning excitement. "So it's a surprise?"
"Of course it is. So close your eyes."
My lips twitched. "Your surprises are just as scary as your ideas."
"My ideas and my surprises are brilliant."
"Remember when you thought it would be a good idea to-"
"Close your eyes, Avery."
Grinning, I dutifully closed my eyes. I heard him walk away and then a couple of moments later he reentered my apartment. "Don't peek."
Not peeking was like putting a slice of cake in front of me along with a fork and telling me not to eat it. I shifted my weight. "Cam…"
"A couple more seconds," he said, and I heard something heavy roll inside.
What the? More than curious, it was a struggle to not open my eyes. I honestly had no idea what he was up to and with Cam, anything was possible.
His hand wrapped around mine. "Keep your eyes closed, okay?"
"They're closed." I let him lead me out of the kitchen and into my living room.
Cam let go of my hand and slid his arm around me from behind, pressing his cheek against me. Months ago I hated when anyone stood behind me, but I loved it when he did. The feel of his arms, the strength of his embrace, the intimacy behind it.
"You can open your eyes now." His lips brushed my cheek, sending shivers across my skin. "Or you can stand there with your eyes closed. I like that, too."
I laughed as I placed my hands above where his rest on my stomach and opened my eyes. My jaw hit the floor. "Oh my God, Cam…"
Before me, sitting on a stand, in a fifty gallon terrarium completely decked out with sand and rock bedding, leafy foliage and a hidey-hole, was a tortoise almost the size of my hand.
He chuckled. "You like?"
"Like?" Stunned, I nodded as I pulled free, placing my hands on the glass. The little guy inside pulled his head back. "I… I love it."
"Good." He stood beside me. "I thought Raphael could use a play date."
I laughed again, blinking back tears. "You shouldn't have done all of this, Cam. This is…too much."
"It's not that much and everyone needs a pet turtle." He bent his head, kissing my cheek. "Happy Valentine's Day."
Spinning around, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. When I pulled back, his eyes were pools of blue fire. "Thank you."
He kissed me again, soft and achingly tender. "You're welcome."
Sliding my arms to his waist, I leaned against his chest. "Is it a boy or a girl?"
"You know, I really don't know. Supposedly you can tell by the shape of their shell, but hell if I know."
I grinned. "Well, boy or girl, I'm going to name him Michelangelo."
Cam tipped his head back and laughed. "Perfect."
"We just need two more."
"So true."
Wiggling free, smiled up at him. "Be right back." I rushed into my bedroom and grabbed the card I'd stuck the tickets in. When I got back to the living room, Cam was adjusting the heat lamp on the terrarium. He turned, smiling softly. "Happy Valentine's Day," I said, all but shoving the card in his hands. My cheeks flushed. "It's not as cool as your gift, but I hope you like it."
"I'm sure I will." Lips curved up on one said, he carefully opened the envelope and pulled the card out. I hadn't written much in the card, because I had no idea what to write. I'd settled on a quick message and my name.