No, that’s too soon. I just killed her man. Not that Landry seems to care. He’s gone. She’s already moved on.That shit creeps me out.
Or maybe I’ve got tunnel vision again. I’m unable to imagine what life’s like for Landry. She said she never loved any of the men she lived with, meaning Neal wasn’t the first bastard she endured.
Besides, if she was angry and flipping out all the time, what would that do to her kids? My club brother Nash “Tomcat” Childs had a wildly emotional mother. No one liked her, and Tomcat grew up with chick issues.
Not that my cold mother amounted to a better parent.
Landry is never indifferent toward her kids. She plays with them, even when she’s tired.
So, what’s my problem? Do I want to ruin things? Or are they already fucked up and I’m not seeing straight?
When Landry hugs me at breakfast, I assume she’s doing her willing whore again. Like when she wanted to get me off last night and then after her shower. She thinks I want her to service me.
I ought to explain how club girls are always around the Pigsty. They’d happily ride my dick. I could do a line of them without ever having to learn their names.
However, I’m not a real person to those chicks. They want to party while they’re young. A few are older chicks, wanting to relive their youth. None of it’s personal. Any of them could wet my dick with the snap of my fingers.
Except that’s not what I want.
Landry’s arms wrapped around me is what I crave. Yet, I need her affections to be real.
I accept she isn’t coming on to me when she mentions the day at Chuck E. Cheese. I noticed how she looked around when I sent over the drinks, pizza, and tickets. Only Blair was invited to the party. Landry’s other kids couldn’t play on anything that wasn’t free. They had to watch other people eat. I could see Landry getting depressed as her kids suffered. Despite worrying she might spot me, I had to get involved.
Over the last few months, Landry rarely noticed me. Even when she looked right at me, she seemed blinded to my presence. Of course, she did that with most people.
Her focus was always on her kids. Not just because she loves them. Beau and Brooklyn both wander away or get agitated. She needs to have eyes on them all the time. After each grocery trip, Landry looked flat-out exhausted and ready for a nap.
I’d watch her and want to help. More than once, I thought to walk over and make things easier.But who the fuck was I?No one yet. Last night, I was nothing more than the guy who killed her abuser and brought her kids to a strange place.
This morning, I’m the man who made her happy that day at Chuck E. Cheese. The affection in her gaze when she thanks me hints at the Landry I’ve fallen for and the one capable of loving me.
After breakfast, I watch Landry try to clean up. Rosemary quickly shoos her away from the kitchen.
“Go rest,” the older woman insists.
Unsure what to do with herself, Landry wanders into the family room with the kids.
“Am I going to school?” Blair asks me.
“Do you want to go to school?”
“Today? No. But I need to learn stuff.”
“I hated school at your age.”
“Probably because the chairs were too small.”
I smirk at her teasing me. “Do you want to live here?”
Blair looks around the room and then at Landry. Finally, she stares right into my eyes and asks, “Are you going to hit my mama with your big hands?”
“No.”
“Will you kick her with your big feet?”
“No.”
Blair looks around again before nodding. “I want to live here, then.”