“Dario, I…I…I,” she pants against my lips.
I cut her words off with a kiss. I’m not ready for us to go there yet. Once we do, there’s no turning back. She’ll be mine forever and where I go, she goes. I can’t take her to Italy yet, so these words are impossible to be spoken.
“Fuck,” I roar as I pull out and spill into my hand.
I don’t think either of us thought about a condom. I chide myself for not thinking. It felt so good it wasn’t a thought until I felt the first rope jet free.
Carleen runs a hand through the front of my hair and ducks her head to look me in the eyes. I lock eyes with her and peck her lips before moving to grab a paper towel and then washing my hands.
When I’m done and I find my legs, I move back to my woman and scoop her into my arms. I kiss her forehead as she wraps her long legs around my waist.
“Let’s get you into my bed,” I breathe against her skin.
“Only because you’re carrying me,” she says sleepily.
I chuckle and kiss her temple.
Carleen
“Rio?”
“Yeah, baby, what’s up?” he replies and turns his head to plant kisses on my stomach.
I close my eyes and try not to burst into tears. I almost told him about the baby while he was making love to me in the kitchen. It was right on the tip of my tongue. All my love for him had come to the surface and the words wanted to burst free.
I calm myself as he settles his head back on my thigh, holding my hand in the air as he plays with my ring finger.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you think I’ve done my thing with you? You know, losing myself in you, becoming a clone of you?”
He’s silent for a moment. When he turns his hazel gaze on me, I realize I’ve been holding my breath. He furrows his brows.
“I never thought about it, but maybe a little. The way you took to cooking, I guess I can see where you might have sponged on me. I’m mean, you’re damn good so…”
“Shut the hell up, Rio. I’m serious.”
He chuckles and lifts to shift and lie beside me. He cups my face and runs his thumb across my lips. I stare up into his eyes as he searches my face.
“I think what you do is amazing. Yeah, you may have watched and picked up a ton of things while in the kitchen before you went to school, but you can’t imitate a palate for flavors or intuitions for the most elevated and composed dishes.”
I sigh. “I’m not just talking about in the kitchen though.”
He snorts. “Outside the kitchen, you’re nothing like me. You are everything I’m not. No, you haven’t taken on who I am. You could never.”
I reach to cup his face and search his eyes this time. I go to bite back my words, but something forces me to push forward.
“Why? Because I don’t know who you really are?”
He stiffens and the shutters come down in his eyes. I think he’s about to retreat from me altogether, but he purses his lips and shakes his head.
“There are parts of me you should never get to know or see. I’ve spent my entire life shielding you from so much. It’s why I need you to trust me. Some things are better unknown.”
“Is that realistic, Rio? Can we do this without me knowing who you truly are?”
He looks up at the ceiling and blows out a breath. I chide myself for pushing and ruining the moment. He reaches for my hand and brings it to his lips.
“I know we can. We have to. Losing you isn’t an option in any of this. There’s a lot going on, but I’m going to make it all go away one way or another. We’ll be together. I promise.”
I smile and snuggle closer to him. His heat is so welcoming. He wraps my legs with his and pins me beneath him. I look up into his eyes with my next words.
“And you’ve never broken a promise to me.”
“I’ll give my all to have you. My life, my title, everything I am. So be sure it’s a promise I plan to keep.”
The words are on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t get them out as he shifts his body and slides into me and rocks my entire world, leaving me speechless.
Chapter 24
Who Are You?
Dario
It’s Christmas Eve and I still haven’t told Carleen about the change in my plans. Things have been too good the last few days. It’s been like the calm before the storm.
I want to keep this feeling. I don’t know how long I’ll have to be without my woman and I’m already going through withdrawal. I haven’t been able to stay away from her all service. I’ve abandoned my station and thrown the line off all night. Thank God for Apollo.