I was studying in the library, tucked into a small reading nook, and my mother must have forgotten to check if I was there. If I were a good girl, I would have stood up and announced myself, but it was too late. I’d already overheard what she was saying to my father, and I wasn’t going anywhere.
A woman should at least be in the room when her fate was decided, shouldn’t she?
“She needs to take care of the family. She is the youngest. It is her responsibility,” my mother, Dami, said breezily.
My father sighed as if he’d heard this before.
“Dami, maybe Hana wants something different. She grew up in America. Her sister and brother are here. I doubt she wants to go to Seoul.”
“She’ll get used to the idea. Besides, Hamoni is getting frailer every day, and it’s Hana’s turn to care for her.”
“I thought that was your job. You’re her daughter,” my father said.
A pointed silence reigned for a moment.“I’m needed here unless you’re telling me I’m not?”
My father didn’t rise to that bait, smart man.
Dami’s voice was filled with satisfaction. “So, it’s decided. She will return home, care for her grandmother, and that will be that. There’s no point in her studying further here. She’ll have no need of advanced math to run the Song household in Seoul.”
My father sighed, and I recognized the sound. It was the sound of resignation.
I sat there for a long time after they’d gone. I knew the drill. I’d heard of it happening to cousins when others fulfilled all the family obligations.
I climbed out of the nook, shaking desperately. I wasn’t a romantic woman. Nothing in my life had given me those kinds of notions, but I had some things I wanted to experience at least once.
I wanted to finish my degree at Columbia, and I wanted to sleep with a man of my choosing. Those were the two things I’d be denied if I went along with my mother’s plan.
Finishing my degree might be impossible if she sent me away, but the other part?
That was totally doable. That night, right then and there, I started to plan.
* * *