Summer
Iusuallylovethesilence, but right now, as I lie in bed staring at the ceiling, I need noise. Lots of it. Someone repeatedly hitting a pan with a wooden spoon or blowing a trumpet in my ear.All of it!It’s going to take a lot to pull me from the thoughts I have running through my head.
As soon as I walked out of Dylan’s room earlier tonight, I walked straight to my car and headed home. Obviously, seeing my departure, Cory called and offered to come home, even begged me to open up, but I told her to stay with Nate. That I was fine. I didn’t need a babysitter. I just needed to get out of my head. I’m not even sure what I expected was going to happen when Dylan saw my scars. Did I truly believe hewouldn’treact? That he wouldn’t ask questions?Stupidly, yes.On reflection, I should have known he’d react that way, but at the time, I raised my guard and prepared to fight.
In that moment with Dylan, I’d wanted him to see every part of me. If only I’d mentally prepared myself for what that would mean. Maybe then I wouldn’t have been as defensive as I was.
The feelings I have for him scare the hell out of me. I’ve never had romantic feelings for anyone. Never felt this way before. The fear that I have, because of that, is stifling. What if I’m not good enough for him? What if I hurt him? What if he hurts me? I want to be able to trust him and trust myself to open up to him; I just need time to do that.
Lying in my bed, with my hands tucked under my cheek, I stare at the door and think about the day Dylan and I first met…officially, anyway. I can still remember the look on his face when his eyes met mine. It was a look I’d dreamed about as a kid. As a ten-year-old girl with her first crush.I saw him from a distance, as we both grew up over the years, but never approached him after that day. I was too embarrassed about what he’d witnessed, not that he even knew who I was.
When I saw Dylan again early this year, I was momentarily shocked. The last time I’d seen him was at my family home, when my brother had his first and only college party. He may have changed, but I would never forget him. I should have left him alone. I should have stayed in my lane, but I had to say hello. That’s all I wanted. All I had planned. And yet, here we are. I roll my eyes at myself.Look how that turned out.
My phone ringing interrupts my thoughts, and I welcome the distraction. Sitting up, I wipe under my eyes and run my fingers through my hair, as though the caller can see me and will judge me for being such a mess. “Hello?” I say hesitantly, releasing a quick breath.
“Summer?”Thomas?
I stiffen as my heart begins to race.Why is he calling? What could he possibly want after all these years?I close my eyes and answer. “Yes, this is Summer,” I say confidently, pretending I don’t recognize his voice.
“I thought I told you, begged you, to stay away from my friends.” I grimace as he seethes, not even bothering with any pleasantries. “You’ve already ruined our family; don’t ruin the one I have with the boys too. Dylan deserves better than you. We both know you’ll never give up yourlifestyle, so leave him alone. Leave them all alone. Do the right thing. Don’t drag him down with you.”
Seriously?! He hasn’t spoken to me in four years, and this is what I get? How does he even know?
“My life is none of your business, Thomas. And your so-calledfriendscan do what they like. So, you’ve spoken to Luke or one of the other guys on the team, and they’ve said what…that I’mwithDylan? Well, they’re wrong. Even if they were right, it wouldn’t matter. It’s none. Of. Your. Business.”
Putting the phone on speaker, I stare down at it, fuming. Willing it to explode in my hand so I no longer have to listen to this bullshit. I’m so furious I—
“It was Dylan.”
Huh?
“Dylan said—”
“Dylan lied,” I say, cutting him off. “Whatever he said was a lie.” I should listen to what Dylan told him, but I can guess. Something heavy fills my chest, and I place my hand there to calm it.Dylan. It was Dylan.
Thomas scoffs. “That’s what I thought. Scars…right,” he mumbles, as if talking to himself, then, much clearer, he adds, “Just stay out of my life, and I’ll keep out of yours. Oh, and stay thefuckaway from my friends.”
With those parting words, he hangs up, and I crumble to the floor.Scars. He said scars.How could he?
My mind feels foggy, my chest tight. I’m not sure what hurts more—that Dylan betrayed my trust or that Thomas knows about the scars now and still seems to hate me. He’s not stupid. If Dylan mentioned a car accident, he’d know I’ve never been in one and yet…
I lie back on my bed and stare at the roof for hours, or maybe it’s only been minutes. Either way, I can’t get Dylan’s words out of my head.“Do you really think I’d do that?”No, I didn’t. I trusted you completely.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Dylan
Myeyesarerollingin the back of my head, and I’m seeing double by the time I stumble to the couch around five to settle in for the night. I’m not going to even bother trying to find a way home. I just fall down onto the soft cushions of the couch and tuck my arm under my head for a pillow. I’ll definitely regret this in the morning, but right now, it’s the best I can do, and at least I didn’t knock out my friend.
A soft buzzing noise starts to annoy me as I’m drifting off to sleep.What the fuck is that?I swat at my face a few times, but the incessant sound continues. I thrash around on the couch, trying to get comfortable, annoyed that the noise won’t stop.
“It’s your phone, you nutsack,” someone yells from the floor nearby.Huh? What’s my phone doing?
“It’s vibrating. For fucks’ sake.”
Did I say that out loud?Fuck! Something hard hits me in the head, and I catch it before it falls to the floor. My phone.My phone!I check the screen to see that Summer is the one causing all the buzzing.Well, this is a pleasant surprise.
“Hey, babe,” I slur and cringe. Even in my inebriated state I know that sounded creepy. Clearing my throat, I try again. “Hi, Summer.”