Jesus. I cringe. I’ve heard enough. “Okay, well, Nicole and Jess cheated on me. How does that fit your mold?” I blurt, trying to turn this around. Because let’s face it, it’s not playing out well for me.
“Why’d they cheat?” he asks, leaning back in his seat.
Shit! “Not relevant. There’s no excuse for cheating,” I say.
Head tilted to the side, eyebrows pinched, Joel gives me a look that calls bullshit, and he’s right. Jess claims she cheated because she felt like I already had one foot out the door. At the time, I thought it was absolute crap. I spent all my time with her. My friends said I abandoned them; my grades slipped. We stayed at each other’s places most nights. What more could I do? But on reflection, emotionally, I wasn’t as invested as she was. She told me she loved me, and I didn’t say it back, because I hadn’t felt it. So maybe to her I did have one foot out the door.I mean I had been planning to break up with her… Ah crap.But Nicole? She was just a bitch; I’m not taking the blame for that one. Even though she tried to blame me. She was cheating from day one. Well, seeing two guys at once is more like it. And neither of us knew. We’ve actually bonded about it since; he’s a great guy and…I digress. Point is, Nicole cheating is not on me, but Jess, well…
All I do is shrug in response. I’ve got no comeback.
Joel laughs and shakes his head at me. “Okay, those two aside, I have pretty compelling evidence,” he says.
I scratch the back of my neck and look down because he’s not wrong. It really is undeniable.So, the big question is, “Who should I be going for?” I ask, and Joel facepalms. Literally smacks the palm of his hand into his forehead. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that’s not the right question to have asked.
“Dude, really?” he replies, looking completely appalled.
I can’t help but laugh at the direction this conversation has taken because of Joel’s switch to psychologist mode. “Is that how you’re going to speak to all your patients?” I ask.
“Probably,“—he shrugs—“since I’m hoping they’ll mostly be kids and teenagers and you’re acting the same age.”
I take a deep breath.Remember, he’s your best friend. You’ve been through so much together that it’s probably best if you don’t punch him in the nuts.Joel’s shoulders shake in laughter as he covers his crotch. Sometimes I wonder if he’s a mind reader.
“Why don’t you stay single for a while?” he throws out there, like that’s an easy answer to all my problems.
“Um, how long is a while?”
“I’m serious. You might miss your shot with the right girl because you’re always in a relationship with the wrong one.”
My brows pull together.Has he been talking to Lucy?
“Okay,” I agree, defeated.
Joel’s eyes flash to mine in shock. “Yeah? Wasn’t expecting that, to be honest.”
“Don’t get a gigantic head about it, but you’re right.” I roll my eyes.
He narrows his eyes, waiting for the catch. He knows I value his opinion and that I often take his advice, but I usually give him a hard time about it and rarely tell him he’s right. That’s not how we roll. Since there isn’t a catch, I say, “Are we done?” I’m ready to move on from having my life dissected.
Joel stares me down for a few more seconds and then laughs. “Yep, session over; that’ll be three hundred and fifty.”
“You wish,” I scoff. “Consider me your pro bono case,” I add, causing Joel to laugh.
We both turn back to the TV, but I’m staring at it rather than watching, my mind on Joel’s words.Serial dater? Is that really what I am? I mean, sure, I’ve had a lot of girlfriends over the past few years, but isn’t that better than sleeping around? Guess it depends on how you look at it. Have I ever started a relationship with someone and honestly thought they could be the one? Ah shit, it’s best if I don’t answer that out loud. It doesn’t paint me in a good light.I shake my head, annoyed at myself. Maybe being single for a while, a small while, is the way to go. It can’t hurt.
“I’m thinking we should make these appointments weekly,” Joel interrupts my thoughts. “You clearly have a lot to work through,” he says, without taking his eyes off the screen, a small smirk playing on his lips.Yep, definitely a mind reader.
I’m lying in bed later that night, staring at the ceiling, when my phone lights up the room. I lazily reach for it and raise it in front of my face without lifting my head off the pillow.This better be important.My head jerks in surprise, and my heart rate spikes at the sight of her name on the display.
Summer: Interesting fact. Nate tells me you hate making s’mores.
I laugh out loud.Busted! I do, I hate it.
Me: If that’s true, consider yourself lucky.
Summer: The luckiest, they were delicious. I will never settle for burnt s’mores again.
We continue to message back and forth a few more times, the smile never leaving my face. And when my head finally hits the pillow again, I huff out a laugh.Maybe our wave at the campsite wasn’t goodbye after all.
Chapter Ten