Prologue
Couples are spinningaround the floor, celebrating the marriage of the girl I used to have a crush on in high school. She isn’t the one capturing my attention, though. No, it’s the girl I haven’t seen in years.
Amelia, Tonya’s cousin, used to spend the summers here when we were kids. She was so full of life, and always bouncing around like a damn cartoon princess. She saw the world through rose colored glasses while I saw it for the shit hole it actually is.
Something has changed, though. Her smile is forced when people talk to her. Her gaze barely moving from the floor unless someone is directly in front of her. I’ve wondered about Amelia since seeing her at the New Year’s party at Tonya’s. The weight of the world on her shoulders was evident then, but it’s worse now. As if she’s one straw from breaking into pieces.
I know that feeling all too well. Growing up the way I have, it’s hard not to be cynical. Seeing all of my friends coupling up and living their happily ever after’s pushes me further toward the fringes. Maybe I can befriend Amelia and we can be in our own little world of misery.
Someone slaps me on the shoulder. “Dude, you should smile more.” Marshall laughs from beside me. He’s always so upbeat about life. I envy him. He’s never had to struggle. At least, not the way I have. The only time I’ve seen him mope is when Bianca wouldn’t answer his calls last year. Now that he has his tattooed vixen by his side, he walks around as if nothing could burst his happy little bubble. I wonder what it’s like to be that excited.
I shoot him a wide grin. “Is this better?” My lips straighten out as the music changes to one of those line dance songs that are customary at weddings.
“That might be the fakest smile I’ve ever seen.” Shaking his head, he directs his gaze to the group of girls dragging a protesting Tonya toward middle of the yard where everyone is dancing. “It’s a time for celebration.” Noticing my scowl, Marshall’s brows pinch in worry. “You’re not still harboring a crush on Tonya, are you? I thought you said you were over that when you got in that fight with Jake last summer.”
“No, I’m not interested in her anymore,” I roll my eyes. “I haven’t been since before we graduated.” Crossing my arms over my chest, I take in the scene. Christmas lights are strung throughout the trees and a couple of floodlights illuminate the yard. We’re all dressed in our Sunday best after a last-minute hitch forced the wedding to be moved here. “I just don’t want to be here.”
“Being here is better than being at home,” Marshall gives me a knowing glance. Yep, my home life sucks. This sucks just as much.
He’s not going to leave me alone about this. He’s determined to make everyone as deliriously happy as he is. “I’ll try to have a good time.” Bianca moving closer to us catches my eye. “I think your girl is looking for you.”
“So she is.” He turns until he’s standing directly in front of me. “For real, Randall. Have a good time. Be happy for them.” He doesn’t wait for a response. Instead, he jogs toward Bianca and wraps his arm around her waist. Lifting her up, he twirls her around until her head falls back in laughter.
Jealousy swirls through my gut. I may be bitter about love and relationships, but Iwantthat. I want someone that gets me on a deeper level than anyone else.
Amelia stands and my eyes focus on her once again. Sadness surrounds her and I want to know who put it there. Not knowing if I’ll ever see her again, I take a step in her direction. Before I make it over to her, Tonya’s hooked her arm around her and sweeping her off to the house.
My shoulders sag, and I turn toward the side gate, ready to leave the party. Passing by the windows, I can’t help but glance at the two women standing there. Amelia’s wrapped in Tonya’s embrace. I want nothing more than to walk inside and comfort her. Something draws me to her, and I can’t explain it.
Fighting the urge to open the door, I continue toward the gate knowing I’ll never get the chance to know the girl who seems just as broken as I am.
One
Amelia
A soft knockon the door pulls my attention away from the crossword puzzle I'm playing on my phone. It’s kicking my ass, though I’ll never admit it. I've been living with Uncle Jason and Aunt Lucia for almost a month, and they still approach my room with caution. Well, it's actually Tonya's old room made evident by all the Bush posters hanging on the walls. Her obsession runs strong, and I don’t blame Reaf for not wanting her to take the entire collection.
"Melly," my uncle’s voice floats through the closed door. "Are you awake?" I cringe at my childhood nickname. It was my absolute favorite when I was younger. It made me feel special. I was also the only kid with a nickname. But now… Now it feels childish. As if I’m waiting for an adult to scoop me up in their arms and keep me safe. I don’t correct him, though. He has to be missing Tonya now that she’s on her own.
I've never heard my uncle sound as unsure of himself as he does right now. They act as if I'm a caged animal waiting to attack. Maybe I've given them reason to believe that. No, there's no maybe. My attitude hasn't exactly been the best, but I'm still adjusting. To be perfectly honest, I'm still hurting, too. They say not to run away from your problems, except I couldn’t leave home fast enough. I need to reset my frame of mind if only to make things easier on my aunt and uncle.
"Yeah, I'm up." Living with morning people is something I don't think I will ever get used to. My feet drag as I walk toward the door causing my socks to get stuck awkwardly between my toes. If any movie needed zombies for extras, I'm certain I would fit right in. Messy hair, smeared mascara, and all.
I pull the door open, and I don’t miss Uncle Jason’s flinch. Or the small smile he’s trying to hide. “Are you sure you’re up? Because you could pass for one of the living dead.”
And this is where I get my humor from. Even though I was a ray of sunshine when I was younger, I never hid my morbid sense of humor. “Funny, I was just thinking the same thing,” I say around a yawn.
“You even sound like one,” he laughs. “Get ready, kiddo. Lucia is almost done with breakfast.”
“What,” a smirk forms on my lips. “You don’t like having zombies attend breakfast?”
He holds his hands up in surrender. “Hey, zombies are welcome at my table any time. But… I think she’s dropping you off at Tonya’s when she goes to pick up Layla. She thinks you need to get out of the house more than you do now.”
Groaning, I nod. “Why couldn’t you be the one related to my mom? I feel like there would be less meddling if that were the case. I’d rather stay in bed and get some sleep. I can visit Tonya anytime. She lives less than ten minutes away.”
“Not everyone has a cool uncle like me.” He peers around the corner, making sure Lucia is nowhere in sight. “Look, I know things are rough for you right now. Hiding from the situation isn’t going to make it any better. You need to get out and live your life. What people say about you doesn’t matter.” His voice is louder now. “Now, get ready before your aunt comes in here. She may be a softie most days, but she has no problems yanking the covers off of you. Just ask Tonya.”
“I heard that,” Lucia’s voice is faint. How in the hell did she hear us from the kitchen? I’ve always said she has freaky super powers. I wonder if Tonya has them, too. Now that she’s a mom and all.