Page 37 of Ways to Go

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“I’ve tried. She’s not answering.” My phone is in my back pocket, digging into my hip. I pull it out, staring at the screen wondering if I should try one more time. Focusing on the take, I do a double take. “Shit,” I yell.

Marshall looks over at me, not knowing whether there’s bad news on my screen or if I’m continuing my pity party. “What’s wrong, man?”

“I’m supposed to meet Tonya and Reaf at a park in Dallas. They want to get a few pictures done for their engagement, and I offered to watch Layla so we can get some one on one time.”

“Mind if I tag along, I won’t be in the way,” he asks. “I need to get out of this house. That book I’m reading for one of my literature classes next semester is crazy boring. I can barely keep my eyes open while trying to get through the first few chapters.”

The legs of the cot slide across the floor as I stand, grabbing my keys off the nightstand between our beds. “Sure, you ready now?”

“Yep. Just need to grab my wallet.”

“Let’s go then. I don’t want to disappoint yet another person in my life.” He smacks me in the back of the head while I rub the small of my back. The piece of metal that goes across the cot to support my weight was digging into me. I may rethink sleeping on the couch after all.

* * *

Klyde Warren Parkis teeming with families. They dot the expansive lawn playing games, having picnics, and just happy to be in each other’s presence. Tonya and Reaf are somewhere having their pictures done. They did the photos of them with Layla before I got here. I’m slowly coming to grips with them being a family unit, but I’m also happy that I didn’t have to see the pictures being taken.

Tonya always seems to know how to handle any situation she’s put in without pissing anyone off. It’s a quality that I admire about her. She’s given me more chances to be a better person than I deserve. She’s also done really well with mine and Reaf’s interactions. Things between us have definitely changed for the better since Christmas.

Layla is pulled tightly against my chest while I go down one of the slides with her. Seeing the toothless smile taking over her face as the wind rushes past us, makes my heart swell. I’m grateful I’ve been given the opportunity to be in her life when I could have so easy been shut out.

“Are you having fun?” My voice comes out high and shrill. When the hell did I start the whole baby talk thing? Tonya would lose her shit if she heard me talking to her this way. Anytime someone tries to baby talk to Layla, she stops them in their tracks. “Talk to her like you would any other person. She’s just like everyone else, just a tinier version.” I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard her repeat that exact phrase.

Lucky for me…she’s not around to scold me. “Do you know how happy you make daddy?” I kiss her chubby little cheeks, bending my head to blow raspberries on her neck. She squirms, making tiny giggle sounds. I assume she’s giggling. She makes so many weird little noises that I never know what she’s actually doing.

Marshall is sitting on a bench, face glued to his phone. I’m not sure why he wanted to come along. He could have easily texted from the air-conditioned walls of his house. There’s no doubt in my mind he’s talking to Bianca. I wish he’d tell me what’s going on with them, but he’s been keeping it quiet.

Tonya and Reaf are walking in our direction, and I stop all the baby talk. I do not want her to unleash on me again about how I’m stunting Layla’s speech development. She really needs to put the parenting books down and just let things happen.

Tonya is already talking before she gets to me, while Reaf takes a seat on the bench beside Marshall. “The photographer wants to know if you want some shots of you and Layla.”

She’s reaching for Layla, and the person I see over her shoulder makes my heart stop. This is not how I wanted her to find out.

Charleigh turns tail, and jogs in the opposite direction. “I’ll be back,” I say as I place Layla in Tonya’s hands.

“Charleigh,” I call. “Dammit, Charleigh, let me explain.”

But she doesn’t stop. She keeps her pace until she’s out of sight, and I’m left watching her leave. Wondering if I’ve lost her for good.

Twenty

Charleigh

I am so fucking stupid.I hear Jake’s please for me to stop as I run away. Who was that girl standing next to him? Whos baby is that? I’m not even sure how to process what I just saw.

The funny thing is, I was going to the park to get some space from everybody at the shop. And…I was finally going to call Jake back. We needed to have an adult conversation about the situation that happened with his mother, without me stomping off like a two-year old.

I saw him come down the slide with the little girl. I stood there, in awe, and watched them for a few moments, butterflies erupting in my stomach. The scene before me, a small glimpse of what a future would look like with him. It may have been a little early to think that way, but it’s no secret that we have one of those rare connections.

I assumed the baby was a cousin or something, but as soon as I saw that girl walk up to him, I knew they were familiar. I could tell the two of them had shared a past.

Hot tears stream down my face, and my nose is runny. I finally slow down three blocks from the park and lean against one of the buildings.

I think back to all the time Jake and I have spent together All the times he texted or came to my place. And I wonder if it was all just an act. Just a way for him to get close to the naïve city girl set on chasing her dreams.

But, he took me to meet his friends, the people spends the most time with. Surely, he wouldn’t have done that if he was harboring a secret family, would he? But how can I know? I’ve never asked him what all he does. As far as I know, he talks to me or hangs out with his friends. Nothing else.

I bury my face in my hands to quiet my sobs as realization hits. Those few times he seemed sad or distant, and unsure. They had to have been because ofher.


Tags: Katrina Marie Romance