We play long enough that the food arrives. Della delivers it herself, and I make sure to thank her profusely. It’s not quite an apology for how things have gone between us in the past few weeks, but it’s the first step. I’ll talk to her tomorrow and ensure we’re on the same page.
It’s only when she leaves through the side door tucked into the wall that Catalina leans forward and inhales deeply. She goes still. “Not fish?”
“I was informed that you’re getting a bit tired of the options, so I thought to try something else.” I have the absurd need to fidget as Catalina pokes at the food on the plate. I find myself almost babbling. “I am on serviceable terms with Bram of the gargoyles, and so I arranged for an import of things I thought you might like.”
“You did this for me?” She picks up a thick slice of bread with melted butter and some spices on it. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to.” Not because of guilt... or at least not solely out of guilt. I didn’t mean to mistreat Catalina, and I can’t go back and change those first few weeks, but I can ensure she is well treated going forward. If she would like to eat something besides fish, that’s the least I can do. “If you want something different, all you have to do is ask.”
“Surely it’s not that easy.” She takes a bite of the bread, and her eyes practically roll back in her head. “Whatever your reasons, thank you. This is marvelous.”
My chest warms and feels strangely light. The sensation only gets more pronounced as the afternoon progresses into evening. We play a few more games, and while Catalina doesn’t manage to beat me again, she’s playing well enough that I have to focus in order to stay ahead of her.
But eventually she’s slumping and my eyes are burning from exhaustion. I don’t want to make her uncomfortable, but I’m willing to press the issue to give us both what we need: her in my bed. “Catalina.”
She holds out a hand, expression mutinous. “I will come to bed with you on one condition—you don’t say a single word about how fickle I am in changing my mind about this.”
“You’re not fickle.” That, I’m sure of. She knows what she wants, but she’s afraid to reach for it, even as she pretends she’s not. I understand in a strange sort of way. Catalina presents a front of being as changeable as the wind, but I’m beginning to see the heart of her.
I hold out a hand. “Will you come to bed with me?”
For a moment, it seems like she might argue, but she finally slips her hand into mine and lets me pull her into my arms. “Only because you asked so nicely.”
“Of course.”
“No other reason. I’m just being agreeable since you fed me bread.”
I hide my smile in her hair as I lift her into my arms. “I’ll feed you bread every day if this is the result.”
“Stop that.” She snuggles closer as I ease into the bed. It’s made for my people, the sides curved and the space filled with large pillows that we can burrow our tentacles around for suitable support. The result is that Catalina ends up tucked against my side, her head on my chest. She sighs. Her voice already slurs a bit with exhaustion. “If you keep doing nice things for me, I’m going to think you really like me.”
I gather her closer and let her breathing smooth out in sleep before I reply, “That’s the thing, Lina. I do care about you. I care about you much more than I realized.”
I want to keep her.
I have six years and ten months with her. It has to be enough.
18
CATALINA
The next block of time is one of the happiest of my life. I don’t even know how long it is. The days are normal enough here, but without any responsibilities to call my own, time feels fluid and insubstantial. And the nights? The nights are like a fever dream I never want to wake up from.
Thane still does have official responsibilities, but he makes time for me every day, even if only for a few games of not-chess before he takes me to bed and blows my mind seven ways to Sunday. The sex is outstanding and only seems to get more so as time goes on, but the quiet moments in the aftermath are my favorite.
The way I’ve found my favorite spot on his chest to cradle my cheek. How he strokes me absently as we talk, whether with a hand up and down my spine or a tentacle caressing a leg or arm. The conversations themselves, carefully curated topics that seem designed to avoid the pitfalls of my mother, my exes, and Brant.
I learn that Thane never wanted to be king, but because he was the eldest, he got the position. Not all the territories in this realm run like that, but both krakens and dragons do. In fact, for a pair of territories that seem to have the most conflict, they seem remarkably similar in a number of ways. Maybe that’s why there’s so much conflict. I don’t know.
When Thane is able to take full days for me, he shows me new places in the territory. We start with a series of underwater caves that open into a graveyard of ships dashed on the rocks above. There are so many ships, I could spend months exploring that space and not see them all. Thane is indulgent as he swims behind me, keeping an eye out for predators as I let my curiosity run free.
There are ships that look like they came straight from a pirate movie and ones that almost look like spaceships. And everything in between. It’s strangely delightful to discover how small my world really is. Maybe that would be scary for some people. I find it comforting.
Once I’ve exhausted my exploration of the ship graveyard, Thane shows me an underwater... reverse waterfall? I don’t even know what else to call it. It’s beautiful and slightly terrifying, and I love it.
Today we pay a careful visit to a spot overlooking an inlet that apparently serves as the breeding ground for the dobhar chu. They’re a strange mix of hound and otter, though the adults are nearly ten feet long. The babies, of course, are cute as shit. “Awww.”
“They’re very dangerous,” Thane murmurs. “They mostly keep their hunting to these waters, but they’ve been known to venture out farther. If you see one, get out of the water.”