“Casey,” I began, my heart aching at what this world had done to my friends and family.
“It was so fucked up. I watched them stake Justin.” His eyes closed, tears pooling there. They ran down his cheeks when he opened them again. “One minute it was okay, you know. One minute the world made sense, and I was happy. Liv had trouble, but I knew all I had to do was love her enough and I could fix it. And then it was blood and death, and I never saw it coming. I didn’t even know what to do. When they started to come at me, I froze. All I knew was the woman who joked with me when I would buy Liv’s lattes still had Justin’s ashes all over her when she came for me. She said some spell and then I was frozen for real. I still wonder if they think I killed her.”
“Who did?” I asked.
“Lily Tucker. Sarah Day’s sister. She was looking for Sarah, but she found me instead. I’d gone to find Justin to see if he knew where Liv was. I’d already tried her apartment. Isn’t that the stupidest thing? That’s how chaotic it was in that moment. I knew it was still light outside, but I went looking for a vampire to talk to. He was my friend.”
I reached a hand out and vowed to thank Lily Tucker when we all returned to Frelsi. “You’d never been through a war before. Any case we worked on, you knew what you were getting into. That day all you were supposed to do was work on figuring out where I’d gone.”
“For a while I thought they’d killed you, too. It took Henri, Hugo, and I a while to make it to here. I looked for Liv. I tried to go back and find her. I tried to reach her any way I could, but until that day when she sent for me, I got nothing. I heard rumors but I didn’t believe them. Even when she tried to capture me, I didn’t believe it. I fought the people who love me. Hugo knocked my ass out and dragged me back here. I didn’t believe it until she tried to catch the kids. She tried to catch your son, Kelsey. I don’t know if she was going to kill him then and there or present him to her master, but she was going to take him by force. She’s not Liv anymore.”
But I’d seen little pieces that were still Liv. “Yes, because she’s missing a piece of her soul, and until that piece is back in place, I will not believe our Liv is completely gone.”
“You would pick her over Fen?” Casey asked, his eyes flaring in obvious surprise.
“She’s not.” Fenrir strode into the room, Evan’s hand in his as she walked by his side. “She would never do that. What my mother is doing is being the loyal, stubborn bitch she is. Her loyalty is legendary, and I only use the word loyalty because she would get grossed out if I used the right word.”
“Love,” Evan said. “The word is love. And given all the things the wolves say about Fenrir being the one who will one day break the world, I’m all for Kelsey being the loyal, don’t-just-kill-a-person-because-they-might-be-evil guardian she is.”
Trent stood in the doorway, his gaze warm on me. “She’s that kind of a woman. She would never choose Liv over her children or me or you, Casey. She’s saying that if Liv isn’t whole and she has a chance to fix her, she’ll take it. Fenrir and Evan, you should understand if you see Liv, you don’t play around. You take her out if you have to.”
Trent always had my back, and that wolf understood me. “But if I see a chance to help her, I will take it. Pain does funny things to a person. Liv lost a part of herself, and she wasn’t used to feeling that kind of grief. I played a part in this. While she was suffering, I was planning a wedding.”
“And she was selling her soul to Myrddin Emrys,” Casey countered.
“I don’t think it started that way.” I remembered those days because they’d literally been last week. “She was working with Nimue to try to find her power again. Do we know if Nimue had anything to do with convincing Liv to part with a piece of her soul?”
I was sure at some point Sasha had gone over what part the legendary Lady of the Lake had played in all of this, but I hadn’t been in that meeting and I hadn’t gone over the notes yet. The queen believed Nim could have a thrall stone, one forced on her at the same time stones had been placed in the king and Devinshea.
“No one has seen Nimue in years.” Casey sounded tired as though even thinking of the past caused him pain. “I don’t know if she’s dead or if Myrddin got rid of her the way he did you and the royals. I seriously doubt she was the one who convinced Liv. I do remember her being seemingly kind to Liv. Liv believed she was starting to feel a bit of her old power when she was working with Nim.”
I didn’t like the idea that Nim hadn’t been seen in years, but I had to leave that to the royals. I had other problems. “That’s my point. She wasn’t trying to go bad. She was trying to get something back, something important to her, and none of us understood. None of us knows exactly how it felt to be tied down on that altar and to have something essential ripped from her soul. Do what you have to when it comes to Liv, and I’ll do the same.”
“Do you honestly believe she can come back from this?” Casey asked.
“I hope so.” I couldn’t stand the thought of losing her. “Even if it’s only for a moment. Even if it’s only to say good-bye.”
“My mother once ran a job on the Hell plane to save her friend. The one who shot her, who tried to trick her into giving up Summer to a demon,” Evan said quietly. “She could have left Sarah there to rot. No one would have blamed her. Instead she saved her, and Sarah became instrumental to my mother surviving many a battle. From what we can tell, Sarah likely saved the world when she risked her life to steal the bag of holding from where Mom had hidden it. If Myrddin had gotten his hands on the grimoire and the Sword of Light, the door would already be closed and there would have been nothing for her to come home to. It’s one of the things Albert always taught us. The grace we show others can become the ground upon which we stand. It can be cold and shifting or warm and solid. That doesn’t mean everyone is worthy of a second chance, only that we shouldn’t write someone off immediately. I agree with Kelsey. She’s not Olivia Carey without her whole soul.”
I might have to ask the queen for a favor. No one was as good at thievery as Queen Zoey. “Do we have any idea where one might keep a soul?”
“I’ll study up on it,” Evan promised. “There are a couple of witches down here I can talk to. Don’t worry. They’re all Sasha approved.”
I’d been told some witches had gone into hiding once Myrddin took over. There were several in Frelsi, including Lily Tucker and her light magic coven. “Good. Now does anyone know the primal Rufus wants us to meet tonight? What’s this guy like?”
I liked to go into any meeting with at least some info on who I was going to be talking to.
“Alvis is an elder in the community,” Evan explained. “He’s an expert on witchcraft and prophecy.”
“He’s super old. Like Marcus old,” Fen added.
“Not quite.” Trent shifted in his chair. “Marcus has a couple hundred years on him, but Alvis is one of the oldest vampires walking the Earth plane. Perhaps the oldest since Marcus is no longer here.”
“And good riddance,” Fen said with a grin.
I was not having that. “Fenrir.”
Fen grimaced. “Wow. She has the mom voice down. Look, you can’t expect me to be unhappy that the old dude stayed behind. All of my life I’ve been told someday this vampire is going to show up, and he’ll either try to get it on with my mom or the girl I’m in love with.”