“It is more than an inconvenience. An inconvenience can be dealt with and discarded. Mate bonding is a natural imperative for my kind. Once it begins, we are unable to resist the pull of our mate to complete the bond, regardless of whether those are made outside of appropriate and sanctioned methods.”
Her mind breezed over much of what he said, latching onto one word. “Mate. We’re… mates?” The concept was surprising but also inspired a warm feeling. She scooted forward suddenly emboldened to try everything she’d been fantasizing about over the last two days. She reached for him. “Then it is okay to touch…”
The good feeling dissipated when his hand closed around her wrist, holding her arm well away from him as he shook his head.
“Not yet,” he growled. “I shall avoid solidifying the bond.”
Her face crumbled, embarrassed that she misread him to such a degree. She attempted to pull back her hand, but his fingers held fast, not relinquishing it. She glared and tugged harder.
“Veral, let go,” she said.
“You misunderstand and are angry again,” he retorted.
Her cheeks flamed. “Look, I get it, okay. This bonding thing is not something you want. I totally get it.”
A rattling sigh slipped out of him and his fingers caught her chin, pushing until she was forced to meet his eyes.
“It is too dangerous to solidify the bond.” She blinked. Was she imagining things or was she hearing a tinge of regret in his words? “Because of that, I have deemed it to be a foolish risk to take. I am responsible for your wellbeing and refuse to put you in the way of harm.”
His fingers slipped away from her jaw and he set her free. Nodding to her blankets, he gave her a meaningful look. “I am certain that we will be outside of the storm tomorrow. Rest, anastha. We have much work to do to make up for lost time.”
Confused, Terri watched him as he dropped to the floor a short distance away. She didn’t even move when he picked up a weapon and began to treat the blades as he did every night. When it became apparent that he was done discussing the subject, she moved out of the way. Walking over to a wall, she slid to the floor and leaned against it as she watched him.
It seemed that even when it came to a sure thing like mating that she still couldn’t win. Terri allowed her head to loll back as she closed her eyes. Of course he was going to just make a decision for them without input from her when it came to her own safety. What if she were willing to risk the danger? The brief tastes of passion and tenderness that she’d received from him were worth it to her. She hungered for such contact and affection. In her mind, it was worth walking a bit on the wild side.
And just how much and what kind of danger was he speaking of? He made it sound almost criminal if he attempted to mate with a female from another species without registered approval. Granted, she didn’t know all the details, but how hard would it be to tell her and allow her to come to a decision about how much risk she was willing to take rather than have the big, gruff alien decide on her behalf?
If it were dangerous for her, it could be dangerous for him too. Terri frowned. Sometimes she sounded like a real bitch inside her own head. Although he put the focus on her, she couldn’t demand that he ignore the risks when it could likely carry some very severe consequences with it. He had demonstrated without a doubt that he was attracted to her, and how much he needed her, despite his refusal to go further with it. His insistence that they wait was still as cryptic as ever.
If he wasn’t going to go through with it, what exactly was he waiting for?
Her eyes never straying far from him, Terri decided to stop mooning over him and do something productive. Digging through her things, she found her needle and thread. She yanked off her shirt and went to work sewing yet another worn seam back together with slow, neat stitches. She could feel his hot gaze upon her, and she swallowed back a groan, her hands trembling for a moment before she wrestled control back into her grip. Turning the shirt in her lap, she tackled a tear where the shirt had become caught on a fence she hopped earlier.
She flushed and fidgeted as it became apparent that he wasn’t going to look away.
“You’re staring,” she finally said crossly.
Veral grunted. “You are displaying yourself,” he muttered. “It is difficult not to look. I am still a male, and a male in the presence of his bonded female. I am not wholly a machine and am a long way from dead.”
Pleasure rushed through her.
“Well… I suppose that’s different,” she agreed magnanimously. “That just leaves me with one question…” She looked up and met his eyes. “Are you enjoying the view?”
His vibrissae fluffed out with a rattling snap, his eyes heating like the blue fire at the heart of a flame. “Indescribably so.”
With that, he turned his attention back to his task, and Terri felt a satisfied grin stretch over her face as she focused on her mending. That response was at least promising!
13
Four days later, Veral knew his control was about to snap. Terri was not deliberately provoking him or inciting his desire, but it seemed everything she did made his civix swell. His body shivered with an awareness that it would not be much longer before his mating pouch ruptured, freeing his civix. He tried not to look at his female as he walked across the desert, making certain to keep his pace reasonable so as not to inadvertently leave Terri behind. Unfortunately, he was aware every second of her at his side, her hips swinging in a natural rhythm as they walked over sand, rock, and packed, dry earth as they led the collector carts to the ship. Veral wished that he could have left her in the relative safety of their dwelling with Krono, but since becoming aware of the limits of their bond, he knew that would be impossible. The dorashnal meanwhile leaped over obstacles as his sharp nose reacquainted him with the terrain leading back to the ship. Both his human and Krono were in high spirits as they traversed with him.
Unable to resist, he glanced over at her. Though her face was flushed bright red from the sun beating down on them and the physical exertion from their long walk, her smile was bright, thrilled with the adventure of seeing his ship. She was never more indescribably desirable to him. He wanted to drop her down onto the sand, strip off her clothing, and feast upon her until his civix burst free to set him off on his mating heat. It was a long walk to the ship, long enough that they wouldn’t be able to return to camp tonight. A prickle of dread raced over his hide. Would he be able to keep tight control over his desires when she was in his ship, sleeping in his personal space, scenting his possessions and everything within it with her sweet, alluring fragrance? He expanded his mandibles, catching a taste of her salty musk, and his civix twitched roughly.
He was never going to last.
Sooner or later his instinct, paired with the demands of his systems, would override all his intentions. It had been a near thing once too often over the last few days as they salvaged. He was so far on edge that it would only take the smallest push to send him over into the rut of mating heat… and he knew that when it finally came, he would surrender to it thankfully. The pain of holding back was a constant companion, aching all throughout the day and night, though he tried not to reveal the extent of it in front of Terri. He ran another diagnostic to see if he could build up any additional programming shields to hold the inevitable off for a little while longer. His lips pressed together in a tight frown, his mandibles clattering in frustration.
His nanos were at their limit. There would be no stopping it now.