The cool breeze rustles my hair, the cloudy day less warm than yesterday. The smell of exhaust and gas hangs in the air, a familiar scent I’ve known since childhood.
In fact, this whole place feels like a second home. Auto Club Speedway will always be a special place to me, and I can’t picture life anywhere else besides here in Cali where I belong.
Cars zoom by as they make their laps around the track, my eyes always following one- #77.
I lean on the metal railing in front of the lowest row of seating on the far left side of the oval shape. It’s my little hideout, where I go to watch the cars race alone, away from the crowds. If it’s only practice, that’s even better because theclub will be empty of the fans.
His car zooms by me again, and my heart kicks into overdrive.Stop, he’san ass.
It’s been over a week since our meeting, and I haven’t seen him since. But no news is good news, and so far, there has been nothing newsworthy.
This week it’s been practice laps every day to prepare for a big race on Sunday. I just hope he doesn’t make me regret my decision. A lot is riding on his performance. And even more is riding on his behavior.
“Hey you, I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” Mel appears beside me with two iced coffees and a big smile on her pretty face.
I take one and mouth,“Thank you,”before greedily sipping the cold liquid. It’srefreshing, so hopefully, it perks up my mood.
“You hiding out today? What’s up?” Mel nudges me with her elbow.
“I have a lot on my mind, is all. I can’t wait to put my feet up and relax this weekend.” I flash her a fake smile, but I immediately know she doesn’t buy it. Why do I bother hiding it from her?
“You always have a lot on your mind.”
I nod but say nothing. I focus my attention on the cars again, but I see Mel looking at me from the corner of my eye.
“Luca is fucking with your head, isn’t he?”
I ignore her, not wanting to admit anything. She already knows about the disaster of a first meeting and how mywhole plantobutter him upimploded in my face. But do I tell her he’s on my mind constantly?No.
Do I tell her I sneak down here to watch him run laps, a secret thrill coursing through me while watching him race?Hell no.
What is wrong with me? I’m not acting like myself. I would never fawn over a cocky asshole like Luca, so why am I now?
And how can I be when I want to strangle him all at the same time?
“Nev? He is, isn’t he?”
“Kind of, but—”
“No, there're no buts. Either he is, or he isn’t. And I vote he is.”
I sigh. “Of course he is.”
“Men. Theytend todo that.”
“He’s just…” I grunt, my hand making the motion of squeezing something. Frustration nips at my core. “He’s everything I hate about drivers all rolled up in one yummy piece of man candy. Like one minute, I want to deck him in the face, and the next, I want to tear his clothes off. It’s driving me crazy.”
Mel chuckles. “Exactly how Mitch made me feel. Don’t you remember?”
Now that she reminded me, the memories flood my head, playing like a movie trailer, highlights and snippets of the best and worst parts.
That’s right, shehated him at first. How did I forget?
“Granted,I don’t work here, but I get how you feel, Nev. It’s confusing and annoying. There was one point when I thought Mitch and I would never end up in a committed relationship. I couldn’t stand being around him, and he was distant. But I think time eventually tells all. If it’s meant to be, it’ll work out. In the meantime, you can either avoid him or fuck him. I suggest the latter.”
I laugh for the first time today and revel in the way it feels to let some of that anger go for a moment. “Why am I not surprised?”
“Very funny. My sex drive is high, whatcan I say?” Mel grins and winks at me.