It’s what he’s thinking as he watches me walk out of the room. I know it. I feel the judgment radiating my way.
But I’ve decided to use my anger for good. Fuck letting these feelings destroy my life.
So when I step out into the garage and stare at my new project, I smile, knowing I made the right decision.
I might feel defeated in other parts of my life, but not here. Not surrounded by my passion. There’s a beauty hiding under all that work, and I can’t wait to get started.
ChapterNine
Chloe
She doesn’t pick me up at the airport, claiming she’s busy with work. It’s fine. I’ll just Uber home, and then I’ll have my car and won’t have to rely on her.
When I get home, the house is quiet, and I remember when it used to be full of life—Drew and I fighting, my mom cooking while my dad watched the news. But now, it’s lonely.
Just when I start to feel sad, my cat, Squeaks, comes to greet me. She meows at my feet, and I scoop her up, cuddling her to my face as she purrs against my skin.
After dropping my bag on the floor and placing Squeaks next to her food bowl, I grab my car key and squeeze it tight. Finally. Finally, the freedom of having my car back. I attach the key to my keychain and put it in my purse.
I’m taking my car back to Cali with me. Being there without a car sucks, and I don’t want to spend another year relying on people for a ride or taking expensive Ubers or cab rides.
With a quick stop in the bathroom to pee and splash water on my face, I hurry to my room, making sure it looks just like how I left it. Phew. It does. I quickly check the rest of the house, and while I notice small changes, there’s nothing majorly different.
Good. I was afraid I’d come back to a place I didn’t recognize. With the crazy way Mom’s been acting, I wasn’t sure what I’d find.
But what I do notice is the absence of Dad. His small touches, his decorations, his things are gone. Before I left for school, things of his were still around. A jacket here, a pair of shoes there. We left everything as it was.
But now those things are gone. Like he wasn’t ever here.
I wonder how their room looks, but I decide not to go in, afraid of what I might find. My heart hurts enough seeing him wiped away from the rest of the house.
My stomach rumbles as I walk back into the kitchen. It’s after two now, and the time change is throwing me off. I left Cali this morning at four o’clock and got into New Jersey at ten o’clock Pacific time, meaning it was one o’clock here. The day feels long and short at the same time. The jet lag is exhausting.
After I eat, I’ll take a nap. Today is a chill day before I hit the job hunt full force tomorrow morning. I need to find something quick so I can start making and saving money as soon as possible.
Pulling open the fridge, I find it’s empty besides a half carton of orange juice, coffee creamer, and some Chinese take-out container. I check the freezer and cabinets, but there isn’t much. Most of it is random items like a can of beans and some frozen TV dinners.
Mom was always great at keeping the kitchen stocked. I guess she was tired of doing it now that she didn’t have children to feed. Either I order in or take a quick trip to the grocery store.
I decide the store since I’ll eventually need to go. Just as I turn to leave, my phone rings from where it’s tucked inside my hoodie pocket.Momflashes on the screen.Ugh.I wish things were different, but our relationship has suffered since Dad passed. We used to be close, and I’d tell her everything. Now, it feels like I don’t even know her. And I don’t see things improving anytime soon.
With a deep breath, I answer the call.
“Hey, you make it?” she says as soon as I answer.
“Yeah, got here about twenty minutes ago. About to head to the store since there isn’t much to eat.”
“No? There should be something you can find,” Mom snips. I hear rustling, a deep voice in the back, and Mom’s insistent no she keeps repeating to whoever she’s speaking to.
Who is she talking to like that? One of her co-workers?
I shake my head as I wonder if she’s lying to me.
“When will you be home from work?” I ask, and the deep voice says something again. This time, my mom answers in a harsh tone but then giggles.
What the hell is going on with her?
“Later. Tom will be with me. It’d be nice if maybe you could have dinner ready or something.”Click.