There was no option but to move fast, spend as little time in the open as possible.
Easier said than done, as she slipped twice on the slick moss and ferns that still managed to cling to the hillside. But eventually, they made it back under the thick canopy, Audrey panting with the effort of the steep climb with heavy pack.
“Need a break?” he asked.
She did, but they needed to move deeper into the forest first after being out in the open for several minutes.
“Soon,” she wheezed.
They continued upward until the canopy was thick enough to recreate the feeling of twilight and Audrey called a halt. She pressed a hand to a tree trunk and leaned, taking slow, deep breaths. Sweat coated the back of her neck and dripped between her shoulder blades. When her breathing evened out and exhaustion receded, she was going to be chilled.
Xavier—the bastard—was barely winded. She gave him a grumpy look. “Weren’t you wounded for a while and laid up? Shouldn’t you be out of shape?”
He grinned. “I was shot twenty months ago. I’ve been back on my feet and working out for almost a year since then. Except for my bum shoulder, I’m in excellent shape.”
Much as she appreciated his fit body when he was using it to please her, right now it seemed a bit showy. A vulgar display of perfection that made her feel inadequate.
“You know, you’re adorable when you’re exhausted and grumpy.”
“It’s a good thing you think that, because I have a feeling lack of sleep and taking care of a crying baby is going to render me just as cute.”
He kissed her, his tongue sliding between her lips, stealing the little breath she’d managed to take in. “Bring it on.”
Dammit. He was too freaking sexy. She was melting on a thirty-seven-degree day in the middle of a misting rain.
His kiss proved effective in erasing her grumpiness. She’d have to remember that. It was quite the mood enhancer.
He leaned his forehead against hers. And she noticed that now he was breathing heavily. She’d taken each moment as it came these last two days. Even making love with him had been an in-the-moment experience, separate from thoughts of a future, because except for him wanting to father their baby, his feelings for her as lover and partner might dissolve to nothing over time. This was a surreal situation, and she couldn’t expect real emotions to be in play.
His words and promises were wonderful. She felt fluttery at the idea that he might really be in love with her. But she wouldn’t hold him to those words when this was over. It wouldn’t be fair to him when she couldn’t even trust her own feelings.
But standing on this steep, wooded hillside, she wanted to believe in everything. She wanted to believe in love and marriage and happily ever afters that included him pushing a baby carriage while she held a toddler’s hand. As an only child, she’d always wished for siblings. He’d mentioned a brother, so she knew he had at least one.
Good Lord. She didn’t even know how many siblings he had.
Did he have religious beliefs? What were his political leanings?
It was okay. They had time and nothing else to do but talk as they climbed the lower slopes of a mountain.
“How many siblings do you have?” she asked when they set out again.
“One. A brother. He’s older. Married with a one-year-old. I expect they’ll be trying for another soon. Fig will have cousins.”
She smiled at that. She’d also always wanted cousins, but she was the only child of only children.
“You get along with your brother?”
“I was the best man at his wedding, and it wasn’t merely a nod to tradition. He’s my best and oldest friend. He and Jae are good friends too.”
“You have a lot of friends, don’t you? Jae, your family, your SEAL team members.”
“Yes. I’m a lucky guy. I have a lot of worlds I fit in.”
She’d never had that—an abundance of friends. Mentors, yes. Friends had been harder to come by for a nerdy girl. She’d arrived in Forks more than a decade before the Twilight boom started and graduated a few years before the first book was published.
Forks had been a normal, financially unstable small logging town during her teen years, and she was the crazy girl who believed in protecting spotted owls, archaeological sites, and preserving the beauty of Olympic National Forest.
She was decidedly unpopular, and that didn’t change even when Forks’s economy shifted to tourism during the Twilight boom.