“But you said it’s too dangerous without NVGs.”
“Too dangerous for you.” It was the simple truth, and she knew it.
She swallowed. “I understand. There’s a lot at stake here.”
He nodded, thinking of Jeb’s throat, Cohen’s finger, the guy who took a shot at them in the woods, and the man on the ledge. “Getting communication back online is our top priority.” He stepped toward her. “I’ll leave you with the gun.”
“No way. Out there, you’ll need it more than I do.”
“Fine.” She was right, and between the SEALs, trainers, and the two of them, he was trying to save almost two dozen lives. “Let’s get you settled and warm, then I’ll go.”
He paced, assessing the safety of the cabin as she changed. The idea of leaving her had him on edge, but he had a job to do.
She entered the living room in clean, dry purple sweatpants that were too short and a University of Washington sweatshirt that was too tight across her chest. She carried a blanket in her arms. “These must be Harriet Jamison’s great-granddaughter’s clothes. Too small, but it’ll have to do. At least the boots fit—cloth, but at least they’re dry.”
“Good. Keep the boots on. You want to be ready to leave in a hurry if necessary.”
She nodded.
“How did you know where the Jamisons hide their key?”
“This cabin was part of an historic property inventory I did for the park. I interviewed the Jamisons for the report. Harriet—who’s in her late eighties—inherited it from her grandfather. Daniel, her husband, is ninety. Given their advanced ages, they don’t visit here in winter or spring. Their kids and grandkids have scattered; the closest one lives in San Francisco and doesn’t get up here that often. Knowing I come this way frequently, Harriet asked me if I could check in on the place now and then during the off-season.”
He raised a hand to touch her cheek, but stopped himself, hand hovering an inch from her face before he let it fall. “I’m lucky to have you with me in this.”
She gave him a twisted smile. “Damn straight.” Then she grimaced. “And I’m lucky to have you. I close my eyes, and I see that guy coming at me with the knife. I see Jeb.”
He took the thick comforter from her hands and draped it around her shoulders, wrapping her in the warmth while being careful not to actually touch her. “There’s cereal and canned goods in the cupboards. Eat something. Rest. But don’t sleep. You need to stay alert. You hear anything out of place, any strange knocks or noises that are unnatural, get your coat on, grab the pack, and be ready to flee.”
“Will do.” She paused, and her eyes showed uncertainty. “Xavier, I—” She shook her head. “Never mind. It can wait.”
“If it’s about what I did last month—”
She cut him off. “No. Now isn’t the time for that.”
“I—I want you to know, I am sorry. But I can’t say I regret it.” It was as honest as he could be.
She flinched. Her free hand formed a fist and pressed to her belly as if his words were a blow to the gut.
He shouldn’t have said the part about not regretting, not when he couldn’t explain. Stupid, stupid, stupid not to leave it at sorry. He cleared his throat. “After I turn off the signal jammer and call NSWC, I’m coming back for you.”
“How will I know it’s you?”
“If I can’t get the phone to work, I’ll knock in a pattern. One, two, one.” He knocked on the counter as he said it, then repeated the knocking without the words. “If it’s safe for you to respond, you’ll knock back with a different pattern. One, one, two.” Again, he demonstrated. “Got it?”
She responded by knocking on the counter, once, again, then twice in a row.
He smiled. Her strength never failed to impress him. And he was a monumental asshole for using her as he had.
He cleared his throat. “On the plus side, if I’m successful, I’ll call you.” He pulled out his cell phone. “What’s your number?”
She gave him the number, and he typed it into his phone. How weird to be getting her cell number now, and not after their night together. He’d ruined something that could have been amazing. What he’d done was unforgivable, even if he could make it right with her boss. It was too much to hope she’d ever be willing to give him a second chance, but with each minute they spent together, that was what he wanted.
Giving in to impulse, he tucked away his phone and gathered the edges of the thick comforter in his fist and took a step toward her. “Stay safe. I’m coming back for you as soon as I can.”
He still wasn’t touching her, just the blanket, but their mouths were mere inches apart. He saw uncertainty flash in her gaze, then she did the impossible and rose on her toes and brushed her lips over his. But her kiss wasn’t soft or fleeting. No. She opened her mouth and stroked his tongue with her own. In a flash of memory, he was back in the lodge as their mouths met for the first time.
Their first kiss had been sexy and sweet and a promise that delivered. Now, here they were again, mouth to mouth and he could lose himself in the heat of her. He remembered vividly the feel of being cradled between her thighs, skin to skin.