Rhys draws his eyebrows together. "You think?"
"It wasn’tjusta nightmare. I think it was a memory." I sound hoarse.
The car is slowing down. "What do you mean?" His gaze keeps switching between the road and me.
Blood pounding in my ears and hands shaking uncontrollably, I know I have to tell him. I rush it out before changing my mind. "I was back in that room. I was so scared. The man was in the room with me, and he, uh...he was talking to me."
Rhys slams on the brakes and moves over to the side of the road, ignoring the car behind us honking ferociously. As soon as the car comes to a stop, he turns to me. "Did he hurt you?" His face is chalk white.
"No!" I force my mind back to the memory, trying to recall his words. "He was sitting at the foot of the bed. He kept saying things like, ‘I had no idea you existed. I’m so happy I found you after losing Audrey. You’ll be happy. We’re family.’ He didn’t threaten me or anything, but..." Panic rises back up, and I try to calm my breathing. "I couldfeelhow confused and scared I was. The fear of not seeing my parents again. Or you."
Rhys is rigid, and his eyebrows shoot up almost to his hairline. "Me?"
I look at my hands in my lap, heat creeping up my face. "Yeah, I, uh...I remembered wishing you’d be with me and that you’d...um, come and take me home."
Rhys’s hand is over mine, interlacing our fingers, and he gives my hand a gentle squeeze. "You’re safe now. Did he say anything else?"
I contemplate if I should tell him the next part. He’s already way too worked up. But if not him, who else?
"He..." Deep breath. "He gave me something—drugged me." I keep talking to our joined hands, and the more I say, the more Rhys’s hand tightens on mine.
"I think it was in the water. I kept telling him I didn’t want it, but he said that until I trusted him, it’d be safer for me. He didn’t want me to hurt myself again."
Rhys goes completely rigid; my hand is in a vise in his, and he rasps, "Again?"
A whimper escapes me, and he releases his death grip. Instead, he latches onto the steering wheel.
"I don’t remember being hurt. What does this mean? Rhys, who is Audrey?" Not that he would know any of that. If it is even real. I mean, that guy was crazy, right?
I watch Rhys closely as he works on gaining control again. The color slowly returns to his face, and his white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel loosens. Taking a deep breath, he says, "I don’t know, but we’ve got more clues. This is good." His voice sounds disconnected, and he won’t make eye contact. He puts the car back in drive and pulls out onto the road without another word. I don’t like it.
The only soundduring the next few hours is the radio. Neither of us connects our phone. It’s like the wall has reappeared. He only asks what I want to eat when we stop at a gas station and then goes back to driving. He doesn’t give me a turn either. I can’t read him, and I’m starting to freak out. I haven’t done anything wrong, but he has completely withdrawn. The distance between us brings the loneliness back. Fear and anxiety start churning deep in my core. The safety I felt this morning has evaporated, and I need to fix this. Whateverthisis.
Finally, I can’t take it anymore. "Rhys, talk to me. What did I do?"
His gaze flicks over to me. "Huh?" The wheels start turning, and I wait. Then it clicks, and the light comes on. "Uh. Oh! Fuck." He expels a long breath. "I’m sorry, Cal. This just...I’ve been thinking. What you said earlier...I asked, but hearing it...what happened to you. Fuck." He shakes his head. "You were scared, and you wanted me to save you. ME! I feel like someone gutted me. I let you down."
What?
I thought he was angry, but instead, he believes he failed me? I’m at a loss. The fluttery feeling in my belly is back, but instead of trying to decipher the stir, I attempt to reassure him. "You were a child. There is no way you could’ve done anything, even if you’d been there."
He nods but still sounds dejected. "I can’t help it."
He resembles a little boy, and I act on instinct. I reach over and grab the hand closest to me from the steering wheel, interlacing our fingers. Rhys’s eyes widen for a fraction of a second, but he doesn’t look away from the road. All the tension leaves his body, and he squeezes my hand back. He may not have been the one taken, but I understand more and more that his life changed that day as well. We’re in this together, no matter what I’ve been telling myself.
After we cleared the air,Rhys is more relaxed, and the crease between his brows has disappeared. He connected his phone to the car a little while ago, and one of his favorite rock playlists replaced the radio. The uncomfortable tension is gone, and I lean my head back, watching the landscape pass by. I didn’t realize how wound tight I was myself and suddenly feel completely worn out. I let the music fill my brain and block everything else out. I pretend to be a regular girl on a road trip. Just for a little while, I want to forget about all the chaos and questions in my life.
Chapter Seventeen
We’reabout an hour out of Santa Rosa, and I’m a wreck.Again. My earlier relaxation is gone, including the girl from this morning that was ready to take this whole disaster of a life head-on. It’s like she stayed behind somewhere along the way.
I can’t stop flipping my fingers against my thumb. Back and forth, back and forth. It’s a tic I’ve had forever and a tell for everyone who knows me. Rhys has already asked three times if I’m okay, and I think if I hear the question one more time, I may lose it. I grind my teeth together.
"Should we go straight to the hospital or wait until the morning?"
Oh, thank God he’s not asking if I’m okay again.
However, his new question turns my stomach to knots. I peer at my watch. It’ll be close to five by the time we get there.