She forced herself to smile at him, hoping he wouldn’t see her sorrow. “Perhaps you should ask me again at a different time. If you don’t change your mind, that is.”
His brows lowered into a confused frown. “You’re denying me?”
“No, I’m not. I’m saying that we should postpone this conversation for a later time.”
He didn’t withdraw from her physically, but she could almost feel the emotional wall he placed between them. “As you wish.”
“My earlier statement is still true. I would welcome you into my bed tonight.”
She saw the flicker of yearning in his eyes before he looked away and gave his head a sharp shake.
She sighed. This man was one of the most stubborn people she’d ever met. But that mattered not, because he’d met his match in her. Hewouldmake love to her. She knew with certainty now that he wasn’t immune to her. He did want her as a man wanted a woman. Only time would tell if he could come to think of her as more than a friend, as more than someone he felt obliged to care for.
She would give him that time. Until then, she’d make him understand that he didn’t need to marry her for them to be together.
Chapter 21
John tossed and turnedin his large, empty bed. As the hours crept by, he found it more difficult to understand why he’d thought it better to sleep alone.
He didn’t regret asking Amelia to marry him. He was confident they’d be good together in every way, not just in the bedroom. But as the clock chimed each hour, he started to convince himself that perhaps the road to wooing the stubborn Amelia Weston lay in giving her what they both wanted.
When he finally managed to fall asleep, nightmarish recollections of battles past woke him early the next morning. Giving up on sleep, he dressed and went for his customary morning ride. He’d hoped the exercise and morning air would clear his head, but when he returned to the stables, he was still conflicted about his future course of action.
Normally he made his way to the breakfast room where Amelia would be waiting for him, but he suspected she would need just as much time and space to think as he. He asked a footman to arrange for a tray to be brought to his study and headed there instead.
What he didn’t expect was to find her waiting for him in his study. She was seated at his desk, and it took him a moment to realize she was going over the estate’s account book. Jeffers must have updated them, and they made it a habit of going over the figures together.
He drank in the sight of her. Her dark hair was pulled back, not one curl framing her face as it had the day before. He was glad to see that she hadn’t gone back to wearing her lace cap. But her spectacles were perched on her nose as she read.
She glanced up when she realized she was no longer alone. The wide smile that spread across her face had him answering in kind.
She rose and moved around the desk, stopping before him. “I wasn’t sure I was going to see you today,” she said, dipping into a deep curtsy.
He almost swore when he saw that the dress she wore was designed to show more of her décolletage than the ones she normally wore when at home. It didn’t take much imagination to guess what her breasts would look like because they almost spilled over the top of her dress. And the way she stayed in the curtsy for several long moments…
He wanted to swear. “What are you doing, Amelia?”
She looked up at him but didn’t rise. The mischief in her eyes had him wanting to groan. Clearly she hadn’t given up on her scheme to seduce him. If anything, she seemed more determined than ever.
Ever so slowly, she straightened. “I’m attempting to change your mind. Is it working?”
If she lowered her gaze, she’d see just how well it was working. “Yes, it is.”
A hint of elation lit her eyes when he took a step closer, but it disappeared when he moved past her and put the desk between them. She pouted at the large piece of furniture that now separated them.
“Is there anything I need to know about the accounts?”
She shook her head, defeat evident in her posture. “Everything appears to be running smoothly.”
They stared at one another for several seconds, and John came to a decision. If Amelia wanted seduction, he’d give it to her. But once he started on that path, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to stop himself from taking her to bed before she accepted his offer of marriage.
He reached out to her. Her mouth turned up again with a cautious smile as she rounded the desk and placed her hand in his. Neither of them were wearing gloves, and warmth unfurled in his chest as he engulfed her smaller hand in his.
“One kiss,” he said.
He didn’t mind the look of triumph that crossed her face. They were both getting what they wanted in that moment.
“I’m content to start with that, my lord.” She dipped into another curtsy but kept her hand in his. Once again, he was presented with a generous display of her breasts.