It makes a man wonder what she’s like when she’s not pissed off.
My stomach rumbles, and I check my watch.
“Welp. Time for lunch!” I sing-song my way back into the house, whistling a country tune by my favorite artist; cautiously peering from the kitchen into the dining room for any signs of my roomie before tiptoeing to the fridge.
I want to forage around in private; I don’t need her breathing over my shoulder and harping on me ’cause she’s mad.
No.
I wanna eat, and the deck can wait.
I need to feed the beast.
* * *
Duke:Knock knock…
Posey:Whose there?
Duke:It’s me, Duke.
Posey:I just rolled my eyes—I thought you were telling me a knock-knock joke.
Duke:I don’t know any good jokes. I’m shit at telling them. I’ll spare you.
Duke:Also.
Duke:It’s spelled WHO’S—not WHOSE.
Posey:Oh my God, you are so annoying.
Duke:Funny, Eli called me annoying today during our conference call.
Posey:He’s a smart guy. A VERY smart man.
Duke:I’m going to ignore you now.
Duke:Okay, I’m back. I don’t have the patience to ignore you.
Posey:LOL
Posey:You’re WAY too easy…
Duke:Actually, I’m not, but okay.
Posey:What do you mean “Actually I’m not?”
Duke:It just means I don’t know why I’m on this dumb dating app; it’s not like I’m gonna fall in love with anyone here or take anyone out. You’re right. It’s pointless.
Posey:Well, in your defense, you did admit you only downloaded it because you’re bored. So you get a hall pass.
Duke:A hall pass? Do you even know what that is?
Posey:Yeah, a get-out-of-jail-free card.
Duke:Um, FALSE: a Hall Pass is when you’re in a relationship, but you get to choose like a celebrity or something to bang if you ever get the chance. Your boyfriend can’t go apeshit and consider it cheatin’.
Posey:OH DUH—I knew that!