“Why don’t we have pie? Did you throw it away?”
“Duke.” She gives me a hard stare. “We ruined the pie. So we can’t serve it at dinner.”
Oh.
That’s right, she gets weird when food has holes and big chunks of it already eaten or tampered with.
“How’d you ruin the pie?” Eli is leaning back in his chair, full from dinner but interested in how we ruined the pie.
“Sex pie.”
“Sex pie?” His eyes are wide as saucers.
Posey swats at me with a nearby hand towel. “Oh my God—no. It’s not sex pie. He just wouldn’t leave the pie alone after I asked him to a few times, so it’s covered with germs.”
She’s so embarrassed.
“Liar.”
“Seriously, what’s sex pie?”
I cross my arms in front of me, the authority on the subject. “Sex pie is coconut cream pie you use to rub on your girlfriend’s naked body so you can lick it off. It’s like pre-dessert.”
“Oh my God.”
“So…you rubbed my pie all over each other, and now I can’t have dessert?”
I shrug. “I can always send it home with you. Then you can have sex pie later.”
“No one is having sex pie!” Posey is as red as I’ve ever seen her.
Molly pulls a face. “I mean, how much of it is ruined? I could do pie later.” She winks at Eli.
The whole thing is crazy to me; being friends with my agent and having him in my girlfriend’s house—considering I’d gotten fucked over by my first one and never thought I’d trust one again to look out for my best interests.
Now he’s in Posey’s home—er, Molly’s house, but still—eating food at her table; food that she and I put in serving bowls together once it arrived via Delivery Dash, the steak house in town.
The other thing that’s crazy?
Letting him see my natural habitat; let him hear me discussing sex and relationships, two things that have nothing to do with my career.
I'm paying Eli Cohen bucko dinero (a shit ton of money) to look after me, so it's bizarro having his girlfriend tell me she wants our leftover sex pie.
What if I was saving it for later?
“On second thought,” Molly is saying, “maybe we could have Eli eat the pie—after all, he’s the one who sent over the nondisclosure agreement.”
“Hey, whose side are you on?” He gawks at his girlfriend.
Molly rolls her eyes at her high-powered boyfriend, no fucks to give.
“Hers.”
I knew I liked Molly.
Doesn’t put up with shit from anyone—same as me. It’s good to see Posey has a friend who will stick up for her. One thing’s for certain: I wouldn’t want to piss off Molly Summervale.
“So this is a thing now?” Eli plucks a cold piece of steak off the platter in the center of the table, picking it apart with his hands now that he gets no dessert.