The fact my mind went there when I’d told myself we couldn’t ever go there again was proof enough that I needed to do some self reflection in my own room.
Yet, he didn’t reach for me. His hand went right past me to push the window and it moved quickly, extending out a few inches before sliding into a pocket in the wall.
He stepped out and beckoned me out to stand over the city on the terrace with its glass balustrade.
I shook my head.
He tilted his, confused. “Are you scared?”
This was new for me. “I guess I am.”
“I’ve had coffee out here, Morina. It’s completely stable.”
“I mean, you say that, but I’m pretty happy where I’m standing.”
He put his hand out. “Come on. One foot on at least.”
“What for?”
“Maybe to prove to yourself you can do it. You can try something new.”
“I surf and try new things all the time.”
He nodded like he didn’t believe me at all.
I took a deep breath and stepped forward enough that half of my foot was on the balcony. The threshold between the two had me wobbling a little, and I immediately grabbed his hand.
The electricity that shot through me scared me just as much as the balcony. My gaze shot to his and a little smirk rose on his full lips.
Nothing more and nothing less.
Did he feel it too?
Or was he just trying not to laugh at my fears? I set my other boot on the balcony and shifted my weight. “If we die and I can make your life hell in the afterlife, you bet your ass I’m going to.”
“If we die, your grandma and my dad will make both our afterlives hell.”
I chuckled. He was probably right. A twinkle lit in his eyes and the wind ruffled his hair enough that he almost appeared approachable, like we were on equal footing.
Maybe that’s why my words flowed more freely than they should have. “I don’t know if I’m scared of this marriage or scared I’m going to take all this on and not be able to finish it. I don’t finish a lot of things I start.”
“Why do you think that is?”
“Might be that my brain’s wired a little differently. My grandma always said I had a jumpiness to me. My teachers claimed it was an attention issue. Yet, I think it’s just that everyone’s different and, in the end, that’s what makes us all the same. I struggle to keep my attention on one thing long enough to see it through.”
“Well, we’ll just have to switch it up every now and then.”
“Or we can just power through these six months.” I suggested, uncomfortable that Bastian had so easily accepted something about me that I was normally embarrassed about.
“Sure, Morina,” he murmured. “Sure.” He waved me back inside and told me we needed to dial Mr. Finley.
We sat there in silent as the phone rang and rang.
When he answered, Bastian gave him the news and I confirmed it.
“I’ll check that off the list and make sure we legally document this milestone. Congratulations.”
Or condolences.