“Meek, you ready?” His azure eyes searched mine, mouth wet and jaw tense like he was holding back.
I wasn’t sure I could respond, but my body did for me. My legs spread, willing and wanton for him. He slid a hand down my stomach and rolled each finger over my clit before he tested how wet I was. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this.”
I stroked him as he did me, keeping his pace. “I’m sure I have an idea.” I moaned and arched my back when he sucked a nipple into his mouth.
“Jay, I’m close,” I admitted between panting and moaning. I warned him so he could take me, so we could go over the edge of oblivion together. Yet, he worked me faster and grabbed my wrist, pulling my hand out of his boxers. He lifted it above my head and continued to trail kisses over my chest.
“Let go, little one.” His words were so soft I almost didn’t hear them. My orgasm hit like a wild animal that had been caged forever. The way he made love like he worshiped me, the way he took his time to bring me to the edge, the way Jay was Jay roused something foreign in me.
I thought I knew love. I thought I’d felt butterflies in my stomach. I thought Dougie had shown me what there was out there.
I was wrong.
Jay watched me with adoration in his eyes, with something new sparkling there. “I think I found my new addiction.”
I shook my head, trying not to fall down the rabbit hole of love without at least grasping for a handhold. “It’s just different when you do it with someone you know, Jay.”
“Is that all, Meek? This just like being with someone else you know?”
I tried to tell him it was. I tried to keep a level head, but the smile that spread across his face was a challenge. Then he dove down to kiss me like I was all he could ever be addicted to. He kissed like he was a junkie and I would deliver the fix, the high, the rush.
Except I felt it too. He was bleeding into me, pumping into my veins to intoxicate every part of me. He slid his hands to hold my jaw open farther, so he could taste every part of my mouth.
It wasn’t soft anymore. His hands were rough, his touch desperate, he was everywhere as he wedged himself between my legs and pushed into me.
I arched and took all of him in. I hissed out his name; I clawed at his back; I bit his shoulder, not sure what marks I would leave. I wasn’t nervous about the repercussions; I wasn’t thinking about how he’d react.
With Jay, I was safe. With Jay, I could do anything.
We fell over the edge together, and the fall was just like the moment you drop from the top of a rollercoaster ride: you scream for your life, wonder if you’ll survive, and then experience the ride of a lifetime. There isn’t a feeling more invigorating in the world than the moment you think you might lose yourself, only to come out of the experience hands shaking and adrenaline pumping. I felt like I could do anything, and as I came down from our rush, I realized that was because he believed I could too.
And that pinpointed the shift from what I was before to how I would be going forward.
Jay’s forehead leaned onto mine. “I misjudged you.”
“Huh?”
“I thought you were just a pebble, but you’re a wrecking ball. I’m wrecked for other women now.”
I chuckled at his automatic charm, but his mention of other women shattered the idea of having something more with him. I started to sit up. “Jay, I need to shower and you need to go to bed.”
“For what?”
“I don’t know. I mean, you can’t stay in here,” I stuttered out.
“Why not? What if you need some more fun tonight?” He rolled onto one of his elbows and dragged a hand up my stomach.
I quivered, and my nipples stood to attention.
“You might need more fun right now,” he said, staring at them.
I jumped up and grabbed the sheet to wrap around myself. “I don’t. You need to go before Lorraine gets home.”
“Lorraine would love to know we’re fooling around in here.”
“Jay!” I stomped my foot. “Come on.”
He slid out of bed, languid as ever, and I noticed he was growing hard as a rock again as he grabbed his clothes and pulled on his jeans. He bunched up the boxers and shirt and put them under his arm before grabbing the sheet to pull me close. “I’ll be sneaking back in tonight.”