chapter NINETEEN
Lesson of the Day:
Don’t dim your light just so someone else’s can shine brighter.
Mikka
I shouldn’t have made a scene, but my blood was boiling over. Sandy was the perfect woman to catch Jay’s eye and he hadn’t even turned her down in front of me.
Not that he should have.
We hadn’t established anything between us. I knew that. I knew we probably never would.
Still, I deserved a little respect. And maybe my heart wanted a bit more than that.
Add to it that he teased me all through the store and then had the audacity to compliment my Type A nature after.
I was getting whiplash and he deserved to lose because of it. The audience was icing on the cake.
And, man, it felt good to win, even if it was something so small. The clapping and whooping and chanting of my name had me smiling. One person even let out a whistle, as if this was the best entertainment they’d had all week.
“I knew you were amazing even in stilettos,” Delilah announced. She hugged me while Ray went to get me a celebratory drink.
“We were just fooling around,” I mumbled, not sure how to take the compliments for such a small victory, one that was really just a joke. I’d been first in my class, won a state spelling bee, and graduated with two majors and a cumulative 4.0 GPA. My mother might have patted me on the back. We didn’t have a crowd. There was never cheering or clapping.
Delilah leaned in. “No, Mikka. This is your official initiation into the town. Maybe it doesn’t feel like it now, but you just became one of us by putting a Stonewood in their place.”
I brushed the grass off my knees and acted as if her words didn’t shoot straight to my little lonely soul. I knew I was leaving this small town soon. So, fitting in here shouldn’t have meant anything. Yet, it meant everything. “If you say so. We got all the materials for the pie in the back of Jay’s truck. We should get to it, right?”
Delilah nodded and waved Lorraine toward the vehicle. “We better start baking if we’re going to feed this town.”
“My pies aren’t going to be the only eats at the festival, Delilah,” Lorraine said, but it was through a knowing smile.
We hurried over to the truck, and I picked up a few bags. Jay met us there and grabbed the rest quietly. I lingered so that I could walk with him. “Sorry I had to beat you in front of all your friends. But if it helps ease the pain of losing, I’m happy to help you open a jar or two here and there in the next few weeks if you’re ever having trouble.”
He chuckled, not at all the sore loser. He appeared to look even happier. “All in good fun, right? Not like you’re really going on that date with Brady, right?”
“Of course I am,” I replied. “He was nice enough to ask and I’m not cancelling now.”
“You’re kidding me.”
I shook my head and smiled at his jaw working and his biceps flexing. “It’s just a date, Jay.”
“God damn, just a date,” he grumbled and then tilted his head to the side so fast his neck cracked. “You’re driving me insane. You know you’re not supposed to be doing that. You’re supposed to be helping me.”
I shrugged. “You wanted to push your boundaries and see what you could handle.”
He glared at me, but I saw the hint of a smile crossing his lips. “You’re ruthless, Little Pebble. When do you work out? I never see you doing a damn thing.”
“I do it at night before bed sometimes. Mostly yoga,” I admitted. “I need it to relax. I used to get really bad anxiety when I was at school. In high school, I started to have panic attacks. My mother researched what I could do about it and called enough therapists in. We found yoga worked for me.
“You’re mom always pushed for what was best for you, I see.” He said thoughtfully.
I nodded. “And I’m thankful she did.” I knew for a fact it was a good thing. “I don’t say it much, but she’s shaped me into who I am. I have a lot of flaws, but I’m proud of what I can do. And you never know what you can do until you push yourself hard enough to break.”
It was true. I was still standing next to Jay, still walking down the village sidewalk, smiling from ear to ear, even knowing I’d survived a terrible couple of months with Dougie.
Jay slid his hand around my elbow to slow me down and rubbed the inside of my arm as he said, “Sometimes you need to know when to walk away from the pushing through, Meek.”