I waited a second longer to emphasize the gravity of the situation and then said the words I knew would pull him down into darker, more ominous depths. “He’ll recast you, Jay.”
Those beautiful blue eyes widened. Then, he stumbled back and hunched over like I’d socked him in the stomach. This role meant everything to him. He’d wanted it for so long, to be taken seriously as an actor, as more of a rom-com star.
“And our agency will drop you. I was informed this morning.”
“What do you mean? We’ve shot everything except the scenes in my hometown.” Jay shook his head and combed his fingers through his dark, thick hair.
“I said the same thing.” I shrugged, trying to stay professional and calm. “The director doesn’t care. He said this movie is too important to be overshadowed by an actor who’s too wild to keep some powder off his nose.”
Jay’s face dropped.
“Those were his words, not mine,” I clarified, not giving him the information about me possibly being stripped of clients too. He needed to do this for himself, not anyone else. “So, this is for you. And for your future. Not mine. I’m fine either way.”
I was lying through my teeth. My life was unraveling and I was fumbling to grasp the threads to stop it. Dougie and I would never be the same. And I couldn’t lose everything I’d built my life on. Without Jay, without my clients, without what I’d worked so hard for, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to weave together a life I wanted.
His jaw worked and I could swear he ground away most of the enamel in those seconds. “I’ll try it in LA. I don’t want my family or anyone else but the agency aware. I want the movie and so I’ll do the time they think I need.”
“Perfect. Let’s get you there.” I clapped my hands.
He stepped in front of me. “Wait. I’m not going now. I need to go home and get packed.”
“They’ll have what you need delivered.” I reached for my leather book bag but he scooped it up before I got to it. “I can carry that.”
“Mmhmm.” He hummed as he took one last look at the room with me.
I scanned the white counters, the lush furniture, and the beautiful view. “Nice place to stay.”
“It’s nice until you lose yourself in it,” He said as his electric blue eyes turned toward the door like he wanted nothing to do with the luxurious life he lived.
I wrapped my arm around his waist and we walked out together. I hoped we were leaving the worst of us behind.
The drive to the facility dragged on for ages. The stretches of silence between us weren’t normal. I knew I should have eased his mind by making small talk as I drove but my heart was focusing on so many things.
I could lose my relationship with Dougie if I didn’t figure out how to work through our last encounter. I could lose my best friend to rehab. And I could even lose the job I loved.
I whispered my fear because I had to tell him, had to let him know someone needed him to come back. “I’ll miss you while you’re there.”
He chuckled. “I’m sure they’ll let me call you, babe. It’s LA.”
“Jay.” I sighed and turned down another street lined with palm trees. The road turned to bricks and the landscaping on the block became extravagant. “This isn’t going to be a walk in the park. You drink every night. I don’t know how much you’re using, but they aren’t going to let you make calls if they think you’re dependent on a substance. They don’t want you to be at risk of relapsing…”
“Meek, it’s fun. F-U-N. Not drugs, not dependency, not an addiction. I promise.” His blue eyes shined with promise but his leg jittered with fear.
I shot my hand out to steady his thigh. “I’ll be here when you’re ready to come home, okay?” As I pulled up to the center, my jaw dropped when the entrance came into view. The brick paved driveway circled a stone fountain. Perennials bloomed in sections around it and the pillars of the entryway were made of the same stone. As I put the car into park, our view was the same as the rehab’s: The Pacific Ocean lapping at the coastline.
“Doesn’t seem too bad. You and Dougie want to come stay too?” Jay joked. His nature was to lighten the mood, to mask the gravity of the situation. Yet, him bringing up Dougie now didn’t lighten anything. I wanted to tell him, to share my burdens with my closest friend.
I grabbed his hand and squeezed instead. Today, I would be selfless. And every other day after that. Because Jay needed a friend in that moment. He needed someone to be there only for him. I wasn’t sure he understood his addiction, if he was in denial or trying to cover up how bad it was. Either way, I’d seen the wear on his body, on his soul, and he had to be scared it was about to take a toll on his career too.
He needed me to be there for him, not myself.
An older man with a full head of greying hair and a genuine smile stepped out of the front doors. His maroon shirt was tucked into his khakis, and his expensive loafers said he probably made a decent living. He waved at us, and Jay’s jaw ticked. “I guess I’ll call you when I get a chance.”
I nodded. “I would walk you in, but I don’t think I’m supposed to.”
He chuckled and patted my leg. “No worries, Meek. I’m thinking I’ll be out of here pretty quick. The agency will be happy, the movie will move forward. No biggie.” He shrugged but his shoulders were tight.
“You’re sure you don’t want me to call anyone?”
“I will if I need to,” he mumbled and got out of the car. He rounded the car and tapped on my window. I rolled it down.
His aqua blue eyes stared at me and I saw the turmoil in them. “Meek, if they say I’m at my worst, prepare for me at my best.” He winked at me. “I promise I’m going to get there.”
Before I could say more, he walked away.
Jay at his worst was still the best man I’d ever met.