“I wish you’d sit down.”
“I can't,” Naomi replied, pacing up and down Sam’s living room like a caged animal. Sheneededto be moving right now. It was a physical need. There was so much anxiety swirling around inside her that if she didn’t keep herself on the move it would come bursting out. That was unacceptable.
“Naomi, it wasn't a suggestion. Sit down,” Clara ordered.
She just shook her head and kept moving.
All of a sudden Sam was in front of her. “Sit. Now.”
“No.” Her breath caught in her rough throat, and she burst into another fit of coughing. She had barely been able to go more than a few minutes without coughing. Each gasp was agony, she wanted to rip her throat and lungs right out of her body. By the time her breathing had settled somewhat, Sam had already maneuvered her back to the sofa. “I need to move,” she implored.
“I get it, Naomi, I really do, but reality is you’re recovering from a concussion and now smoke inhalation. You need to be taking it easy right now. I'm sorry, I know that’s hard for you. Especially right now.”
Sam really did understand because she had admitted to him why she hated being sedated in her hysteria after he’d carried her from her burning home. She wasn't sure why she kept opening up to Sam. Giving an inward sigh, she forced herself to be truthful, she knewexactlywhy she kept opening up to Sam.
“I went to bat for you, Naomi, with the paramedics, with Jonathon, with your sisters. I stopped them from taking you to the hospital and sedating you, so I think you owe me at least sitting quietly on the couch.”
“Way to play hardball, Sam,” she muttered.
He gave her a one-sided smile. “Deal?”
“Deal,” she reluctantly agreed.
“I’m really glad you finally started talking about the fire.” Clara sat beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
“I’m not,” Naomi whispered under her breath, she felt very exposed now. Not so much about the facts, but that she admitted to Sam her guilt over her baby brothers’ deaths. She cared about how Sam saw her, what he thought of her, and she was worried that him knowing she hadn’t saved her brothers would make him think less of her. Realistically, she knew it wouldn’t, but sometimes her head and her heart forgot to communicate.
“You know you have nothing to feel guilty about, right?” Clara’s green eyes studied her anxiously. “You got yourself out, and Ruth and Seth. If you could have you would have gotten David and Eli out too. You were just a little girl, Naomi. You did what you could.”
She chanced a glance at Sam to gauge his expression, but he was standing on the far side of the room and had his back to her. He held his emotions even closer to his chest than she did. She often struggled to figure out what was going on inside his head. Except today. When he’d knelt in the snow in her yard, cradling her in his arms, she had felt everything he felt for her.
He had told her that everything would be okay. That together they would make it okay. Did he really mean that? After he’d said it, he’d kissed the top of her head. The gesture had melted her heart more than if he’d kissed her on the lips because it was so tender, it made her feel so wanted, so cared about, and so taken care of.
“Did Jonathon call yet? Do they know anything about the fire? Was it arson or accident?” she fired off questions. If she couldn’t keep her body moving, she had to keep her mind active.
“He hasn’t called yet,” Sam replied, but he still wouldn’t turn around to look at her. What was stopping him? Had his feelings for her changed already?
“What if the fire was deliberate? Both of them I mean. The same person must have started both. With the timing it has to be the same person who is stalking me. What if he goes after the rest of my family?” Naomi made an abortive move to stand, but Aggie preempted her by pressing a hand to her shoulder.
“You promised Sam you’d sit,” her sister reminded her.
“He could be after my sister or my mom.” Since she couldn’t pace, she began to twist her hands in a near frantic motion.
“Relax, Naomi,” Clara ordered.
“Relax?” She would have screeched, only she wasn't a screecher. “What if he’s after them? Sam is here with me, but who’s looking after them?”
“Try to calm down. There is no evidence that he’s after anyone but you,” Aggie reminded her.
That did little to soothe her. Neither her mother nor her sister were currently in any condition to defend themselves should this man decide to target them. She became aware that she was breathing too fast only when little white spots began to appear in front of her. Her short, sharp panting aggravated her smoke-damaged throat and lungs, and she began to cough, even as she struggled to suck in enough air. The combination of the two, and her concerns over her family, had her in a full-on panic.
Large hands settled on her knees.
A face hovered in and out of focus in front of her.
When a voice spoke it instantly calmed her, even though she couldn’t make out the words.
Sam’s presence comforted her in a way no one else’s could.