“I know, but if she hadn’t gotten pregnant, she might not have had to tell her husband and then her family wouldn’t have been broken up.”
“You know none of that is your fault, right?” he frowned down at her.
“I know. But still, my mom getting pregnant with me broke up her marriage. Apparently, the divorce was messy. He wanted custody of my brothers, and he wanted the house because it had been his before the marriage. He got the house, and we moved to a much smaller place. He had my brothers every second weekend. Whenever he came to the house to pick them up it was like he couldn’t even stand to be near me—he could barely be civil.” She paused before continuing; she hadn’t told anyone what she was about to say next—even Naomi. “I found out later that my mom wanted to give me to my father. She thought it would save her marriage. Apparently, my father was happy enough to take me; only his wife said no.”
Slipping an arm under her knees, he pulled her sideways, so she sat on his lap. “I'm sorry, honey. That must have been tough to deal with growing up.”
“My brothers were great, though, and then when I was older, I met Naomi. I'm not close with my mother, but I still have a really great family.” She wondered about Jonathon’s family; she really didn’t know anything about him. So far, because of the case, the focus of their fledgling relationship had been all about her.
“So, you walked away on purpose that day?” he carefully guided the conversation back around to her abduction.
“Yes, at least, at first,” she admitted tiredly. She was feeling drained now, empty, she just wanted all of this over, and if telling Jonathon what happened that day helped, then she’d do it. “I was angry because my mom wouldn’t let me have friends over for a sleepover. I thought it was unfair because my brothers always had friends over. We were doing the weekly grocery shopping. I hated going to the supermarket; it was so boring. The boys were talking sports, my mom wasn't paying attention, there was an old lady outside, and she had a puppy. I wanted my mom to be scared and worried when she couldn’t find me; I was so angry with her. So I went outside to see the puppy.” Clara paused to shake her head at her stupidity, “It all seems so stupid now, I was such an easy mark, I fell for such a simple trick.”
“You were six,” Jonathon reprimanded sternly.
“I deliberately walked away from my mother, straight to a stranger, even though I knew better,” she repeated.
“So you felt guilty, blamed yourself,” he added.
“Some children are snatched from their beds in the middle of the night. I walked right into my kidnapper’s arms.”
“Which doesn’t make it your fault. Like you said, sometimes kids know the right thing to do, but it doesn’t mean they do it. What happened next?”
“I asked if I could pet the lady’s dog and she said yes. There was a man there too—an old man—who asked if I liked dogs, and I said I did but my mother wouldn’t let me have one. Then something sharp pricked my arm, and I felt really sleepy, and that’s it. That’s the last thing I remember clearly.”
“Except for feeling cold and hungry?”
“Right, and it’s always dark in my dream, but I think the room was actually light.”
“Your memories are there, Clara. Would you be willing to try hypnosis to see if we can unlock them?”
“We? You’ll go with me?”
“Of course,” he said it like that was a ridiculous question.
For years, she had debated wanting to remember versus being happy she didn’t. Now she was at a point where she wanted to know, maybe even needed to know. It was daunting. What Tommy remembered had driven him to rape and murder, but she was ready to face it.
“I’m going to try to set it up for tomorrow.”
She almost balked at the idea of it being so soon, but better to get it over and done with. Katie and Jimmy still stood a chance at being found alive, and she wanted to help make that happen.
“Now, we sleep.” Jonathon lay down, taking her with him so that she lay on top of him. Staring into her eyes, he cupped her cheek; his thumb caressed her lips, then his hand moved to her neck. Instinctively she tensed, but he whispered, “I don’t care about the scar. I'm falling for you, Clara.”
Clara stared back into his eyes. He looked so handsome in the moonlight. “I'm falling for you too.”
“Good,” he smiled.
Then his lips were on hers, and he was kissing her, softly and sweetly, but her pulse skyrocketed. Sooner than she would have, he ended the kiss, then slid her off him. Resting her hand on his stomach and her head on his chest, Clara promptly fell into a dreamless sleep.
* * * * *
9:12 A.M.
“I can't believe you got an appointment this quickly,” Clara mumbled as he led her up the steps and into the office building’s lobby.
“It’s in Katie and Jimmy’s—andyour—best interests to get this done as quickly as possible.” Jonathon took her hand and entwined their fingers.
“I know, but we only talked about it a few hours ago and already you found someone to see me.”