“You need to talk to her...” His words trail off like a goddamn echo that I don’t want to hear. Every chance we’re alone, and he’s bringing up the dynamics of our relationship. Before he wanted to keep her from me. Now he’s worried that I’ll be the one to lose her for the both of us.
I need to talk to Jude, I get that, but I don’t want to. Once I share that part of myself with her, I can never take it back. She flipped the fuck out when I told her I was a killer. I can only imagine how she’d act if she knew everything else. She’s green to this life, and while it’s sexy as fuck, it doesn’t mean she’ll be okay with the way things are done. Or the way I do things anyhow.
Sinner believes once I open up to her that everything will be rainbows and sunshine. Maybe the brother’s a little further gone then I originally thought. I wish he’d understand, but he can’t. She looks at him as if he’s the best thing since Cherry Coke. She’s never seen him when he’s truly pissed off and is fucking with someone.
I may cut fuckers up, but Sin...he filets their minds. I let them bleed dry, while he makes you question why you’re even alive in the first place. I wonder if Jude saw us both in action, which of us would be eviler in her eyes?
“Not now,” I argue while wiping down my handlebars with my shammy towel. It seems that no matter how many times I clean the chrome on my bike, there’s always a damn water spot or fingerprint. Or blood. It never fails, I always leave some behind and not on purpose.
A rumble from pipes garners our attention as the sound of a bike grows near. We both watch as Ruger pulls into the clubhouse parking lot. I figured it may have been someone from the other club stopping by, but this is even better. With Mercenary around, it’s good to have another familiar face in the club; I’m still not sure what to think of the new member.
Using my shirt, I wipe the sweat from my brow and chest. “The fuck you been?” I holler when his bike quiets, and he climbs off looking a bit weary. It must’ve been a long ride to have him showing up like this.
“Prez had me watching the piece of shit Fists,” he replies with a wave and heads for the club.
“Damn, the brother looks exhausted. And I wasn’t aware we had one spot pinned down for those asshats.”
“I haven’t seen him in a while,” Sinner mumbles, running his hand through his dark onyx hair. He’s got it combed back out of his way, but it doesn’t stop the motion he’s used to making when he’s frustrated. “As for the Iron Fists, they haven’t been at the front of my mind.”
“Why’s this so important to you all of a sudden that I tell her about my shit?”
“Because, Saint, I can’t get her to stay here without you opening up to her.”
I let out a grunt of disagreement. She’ll more than likely head for the hills if I open up to her.
“I mean it, she has to know everything. No half-truthing it.”
With a snort, I roll my eyes. “Really, that’s rich. How fuckin’ convenient that she knows fuck all about you, yet the bitch needs to know all of my shit?”
“You don’t love her...”
“Jesus.” Tossing the towel into the detail bucket, I meet his gaze. “It’s been easy, just fucking and chilling. Why do you have to complicate it? You know how I feel about you without me even saying it, so why is it so important that I’m different with her?”
“Because, I want more, and I was under the impression that you do too. I’m not getting any younger, and I’m ready to have a bitch on the back of my bike. As for why you need to speak up with her? Because, she’s a woman; she’s different. You of all people should understand that with the articles and shit you read on chicks.”
“Fine, Sin, then go put her back there; don’t let me stand in your way.”
All the questions have me wound up. It’s been too long since I’ve made a sacrifice and talking about it, only reminds me. I haven’t been keeping my promise to my father, to my family, and now I’m trying to ask the world to give me more. Maybe she does need to see this, and in doing so, I can ask for my ancestors’ blessing with Jude.
The questions and emotions have me taking my anger out on him and then storming off. Thankfully, he doesn’t follow; I might’ve ended up saying something I’d regret. Although, he’s used to me getting antsy like this. With Jude in the mix, it just adds more pressure. I’m allowed to get overwhelmed at some point, though. This is a change for all of us, not just him.
“Prez,” I call as soon as I find him. He’s working on a bike in one of the garages next to the clubhouse.
“Brother?”
“I-I need to go.”
“Excuse me?” he grumbles, standing to his full height. He’s got grease smeared on his chin and three empty beer bottles around him. He obviously has his own shit he’s been thinking about. At least he doesn’t have to worry about scaring off his woman; she’s already married to his ass.
“It’s been too long since I’ve had business to handle.” I get straight to the point. He knows me well enough to understand exactly what I mean.
“Ah, I see. Let me check somethin’ real quick.”
I nod, and he pulls his phone out, dialing someone. I eavesdrop as expected and figure out he’s talking to Ares. I guess someone owes his club money and a lot of it. Not only that, but Viking gets super pissed when he finds out the rat bastard hurt a child. Well, it sounds like it’s going to be my day after all.
Prez ends the call, sighing as he meets my eager stare. “Looks like I got something for you to handle, brother.”
A grin overtakes my mouth for the first time today...shit’s about to get real. Sinner wants Jude to know who I am? I’ll show her first hand, and send her screaming in the process, I’m sure.