"Is he, like, your age? That's what I heard. I like older guys. Maybe I should ask him out."
"No, absolutely not. Nick Hunter is off-limits for you."
"For me? But not for you, that's what your statement implies." She reverts to her stage whisper. "He must be super-wicked hot if you're warning me away from him. I was kidding about the older-guys thing, but you should go for it. Tap that already."
"I can't express how disturbing it is to hear you sing the praises of casual sex."
"Chill, Mom, I'm still a virgin."
Oh thank God. I don't say that out loud because it would make my daughter laugh hysterically. She thinks I'm uptight. Nick Hunter probably thinks the same thing. Not that I care what he thinks.
There will be absolutely no "'tapping" of anyone.
But his smile…his body…
No, no, no. I'm a mature, professional woman, not a lustful teenager.
At least Felicity hasn't rushed to lose her virginity. She wouldn't lie to me about that or anything. My relationship with my daughter is the best thing in my life, since men only ever let me down. Catastrophically. Somebody should invent disaster insurance for relationships to save me from making another horrible mistake. You know, the kind of insurance that prevents you from doing the walk of shame or crying your eyes out for three days straight.
That idea has nothing whatsoever to do with Nick Hunter.
"Soooo," Felicity says in her sneaky-snarky voice, "you must know the British hottie. Nick Hunter? You wouldn't know his name unless you'd met him. I need the deets, Mom. How finger-lickin' delish is he?"
Good enough to eat him up and go back for seconds.
But I tell Felicity, "I'm his adviser, so yes, I've met him. He's…fine. But don't get excited because I won't see him very often. Faculty advisers are for occasional advising, not daily chats."
Except Nick is taking one of my classes, which means I'll see him four days a week. My tummy flutters when I think about that.
I glare down at my belly.Stop that, you stupid tummy.
"Uh-huh," Felicity says. "I bet Nick will need lots of advising. I mean, he is in a foreign country where he doesn't know anybody and doesn't know his way around."
How does she make that sound like I'll be screwing Nick in my office every day? Showing someone around the campus is not a salacious act. Not that I'll be showing him around. Lana gave him a map, so he doesn't need a tour guide.
"When can I meet him?" Felicity asks.
"Nick Hunter? Never, I hope."
She laughs. "Wow, Mom, you're crushing hard on him, aren't you?"
"Don't you have a class to go to?"
"It's summer. I don't start until the end of August." She does that silly whispering thing again. "Is Nick Hunter taking one of your classes?"
"Yes."
"Which one? Because I was thinking about auditing one of your summer classes to, you know, get a jump on my higher education."
"And you think I'm going to tell you which one the 'British hottie' is taking? No way."
"Okay, okay. Don't have an aneurysm. You can have Nick all to yourself."
I hear voices in the background at her end. "Where are you, Felicity?"
"At the mall. I'm meeting Tricia for a marathon shopping spree, and I've got your credit card in my pocket."
"Very funny. Dinner will be at seven, if you're coming home tonight. Don't be late."