"Ah, I see. You don't need to go through all of this. It's not my first time at a nudist resort."
She folded her arms over her chest. "Everyone hears the rules the first time they come here. It's protocol."
"All right. I'm listening."
"No reaching during meals. If you need something, ask someone to pass it to you." She waved a finger toward my groin. "Make sure none of your bits intrude on anyone else's space. And if you absolutely must relieve yourself outdoors, whether it's number one or number two, please find a secluded spot where you can take care of things. No photography without express permission from the people involved. Do you have a cell phone?"
"Yes."
She dug a small, folded sheet of paper out of the basket, handing it to me. "Put a red dot over the camera lens, please. If your phone has more than one camera, please put stickers over all of them."
I obeyed, applying red stickers to the tiny lenses on the front and back of my phone.
Eve nodded her approval. She started to push away from the table but stopped. "One more thing. Men tend to get embarrassed when I bring this up, but it's necessary. If you get an erection when you're outside of this house, please put a towel over your lap or roll over onto your side. If you're in the hot spring or the lake, you can just stay put until the problem subsides."
She watched me like she expected me to blush or get upset.
Most men probably would have, but no one who knew me, or knew of me, would think I'd ever get embarrassed about something like developing a hard-on in public.
I chuckled. "Don't worry. I'm shameless."
"No need to pretend you're cool with it. I'm used to my male guests getting flustered when that happens."
I studied her expression for some sign she was teasing me again but found none. "You really don't recognize me, do you?"
She raked her gaze over my body. "If we'd met before, I'd remember."
Eve Holt had no idea who I was. Her attentiveness and attraction to me had nothing to do with my reputation or my past behavior. It was…refreshing.
"You're good to go," she said. Her gaze flicked to the clock on the wall. "I need to finish getting lunch ready. Once you're settled in, come find me in the kitchen."
"Thank you, Eve."
"I'm just doing my job." She moved toward the door, hesitating on the threshold. "If there's anything else you need, just ask."
"Don't trouble yourself on my account."
"It's no trouble. I'll let you get settled."
She disappeared down the hallway.
I shed my clothes and shoes, then headed into the kitchen.
Eve stood at the island placing food items into plastic trays and closing up each tray with a red plastic lid. She glanced up when I walked into the room.
Her eyes flared wide. She stared at me for a moment before blinking furiously like she was waking from a strange dream. Her cheeks pinkened. She bowed her head to focus on her task. "I see you've made yourself comfortable."
"Are you carrying all that food to the guest house by yourself?"
"My handyman, Quentin, will be here any minute to help."
I approached the island across from her. "I would be happy to help too."
"That's not necessary. You're a guest." She kept her head down but lifted her gaze to me. "Besides, handling food in the nude is a health code violation."
"How many guests do you have?"
"The number varies." She slapped the lid onto a tray and laid her hands on top of it, swiveling her gaze up to me. "The guest house has ten rooms with two queen beds in each. Some people bring tents to sleep out, and others come in RVs and sleep in those. Currently, I have seventeen guests, including you."