The video soon ends, and the light flicks back on. I feel like half a lifetime has passed since this morning.
Fuck. I’m mated to an Orc.
I’ve sat through a number of sensitivity training sessions with other company members, usually teaching them how not to micro-agress the undead, respecting the cultural boundaries of swamp creatures and accommodating the needs of cursed peoples. I’ve seen most of these videos enough to have them half-memorized.
None of them have made me feel like I’m back in seventh grade watching a video about the wonders of puberty through my fingers.
Still, I think I would rather have been prepared beforehand. How many other monsters could I have accidentally stapled their fingers or given a papercut? How does anyone work here, traipsing around, not knowing how they could accidentally trip into a mating bond?
Gwen slides back into the seat next to me, straightening out a stack of papers on the table. I don’t even remember her coming back in. She smiles again in that way that’s starting to make me despair.
“So our policy does not allow mate-bonding on company time or premises, but because this was an accident, and you work in different departments, we’re not going to consider what happened as such. We do, however, have a couple policies regarding mating-bond annulments,” Gwen says, as cheerfully as if she were telling me my health plan options. “Since you two brought this to us fairly quickly after the accident, it should be rather easy. Annulments are a lot harder to arrange after.”
“After?”
Gwen’s smile pinches her face a little. She glances around the room and makes a quick, work-inappropriate gesture. The video probably couldn’t have gone into very much detail about the alluded claiming ritual if that was involved.
My eyes flick to Khent, all thirty feet across the room, and meet his for the first time this meeting. My face burns. Do we need to tell her that we’ve already found the time for him to eat me out? Does that not count?
“Your local pharmacy should sell some sort of over the counter anti-aphrodisiac that most Orcs use, just ask them any questions you have about human appropriate dosages. The company can reimburse you for the cost since it was an on-site accident. There’s also some pamphlets on the different side effects the medications have on different species, though there isn’t a lot of information about how it affects human systems.”
The thought of more outdated company pamphlets giving me possibly wrong information makes me balk.
“What’s the other option?”
“Option two, if you like, you can wait to see how long it takes to wear off on its own. Since you two work on different floors, it shouldn’t be much of a problem. Or we can arrange for one of you to work from home,” she says. “Annulment studies show Blood Fever can take a couple weeks to a month to completely leave the body for Orcs. Again, there aren’t many case studies of how humans are affected.”
I swallow. Trying to get on with my work day mildly horny all the time doesn’t sound great, but it doesn’t sound as risky as taking some over the counter magic herb that isn’t EFDA approved.
I glance down the long conference room table.
Khent has been utterly silent the last few minutes. His chair hasn't creaked once since Gwen mentioned annulments.
I mean, I guess we don’t really need each other’s input on this. This isn’t couple’s therapy, I don’t need to consult him on this. I didn’t ask to be mated or bonded, or whatever!
Still, I guess I got him into this mess. He probably doesn't want to be in it as much as I do.
“What are your thoughts?” I ask, trying not to sound like I’m shouting across the table at him.
The light reflects off his glasses as he turns his head to look at me. “It’s up to you.”
Impassioned pleas, that was not.
I guess the whole bonding thing means about as much to him as it does to me.
I shrug and turn back to Gwen. “Option two sounds good.”
If I’ve never noticed Khent much around the office building before,surelywe can go a couple weeks without running into each other again.