I don’t know what I want, but I still crawl between his sheets, sitting back against the headboard, and let him tuck them around my legs.
“Is it too dark in here?” he asks.
“No, it’s fine.”
August shifts on his feet, eyeing me. “Want me to put some music on?”
“Setting the mood?” I reply and he huffs out a laugh.
“No, just so it’s not so quiet. I don’t like it when you’re so quiet.”
I swallow roughly and he scrolls through his phone. Seconds later, soft music floats through a speaker on his desk.
I listen for a moment and then smile. “Ah, I see your taste in music has improved.”
“No, I just have eclectic taste in a lot of things,” he says as he eyes me.
Damn, my heart is beating faster with each moment I’m stuck in this room with him. Pretty soon it’s going to just explode out of my chest.
I lean my head back and watch him. God, he looks so damn good right now, all warm and cozy in his flannel pajama pants and white t-shirt. I want so badly for him to lay his large body on top of me and snuggle me.
I also really want my dick in his mouth, but I’d be content with cuddling.
“What have you been up to?” he asks, pulling my mind back to the present and I shrug.
“Same old. Working with Lex, hanging with Lex, having lunch with Thomas….”
Our eyes collide and August looks away. He’s still standing, but if I ask him to join me, I’ll end up touching him. I didn’t come over here to fuck. I came here because…I just wanted to see him again.
Even though I don’t know if he wants me anymore.
“What about you?” I force myself to ask. I can be polite. Sometimes.
“Oh. Nothing new. School, work, going to the cages and hitting balls….”
I chew on my bottom lip and then I say, “Cool. Cool. You um…you know, seeing anyone?”
His eyes flash to mine and he shakes his head. “No.”
A breath I didn’t know I was holding escapes me and I feel ten times lighter already.
“Why not? Any particular reason?”
“Not interested in anyone right now,” he says and then runs a hand through his hair. My heart sinks.
Am I included in that?
Probably.
Out of all the people on Earth, why the fuck would someone like August choose me?
I mean, he didn’t.
He already didn’t choose me, and here I am, like an idiot, reliving that pain all over again.
What’s the saying, live and learn? Apparently, I don’t learn very well.
“What are we going to do about us?” he asks softly, and I clutch the blanket around me tighter. “We can’t keep avoiding each other. My mom’s been asking why you’ve not been over. I don’t know what to tell her.”