“Stop saying that. I’m an adult.”
“He’d see it as a betrayal. Like I took advantage of you.”
“But you didn’t. I want you too.” I jumped off the bed to grab my tank top and slipped it on. I searched for my panties and found them on the floor at the foot of the bed.
“I shouldn’t have come. I just…” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I can’t resist you.”
I went to him and took his face into my hands. “I’m not afraid of my dad. The heart wants what it wants. Please don’t do this.”
“Baby, you’re so young. You don’t know any better.”
“Fuck you, Grayson.” I shoved him in the chest. “Go ahead. Leave.” I wouldn’t beg him to stay. Beg him to be with me. If he wasn’t man enough to stand up to my dad, then he didn’t deserve me.
“You’ll see. This is for the best.”
“Right. That’s a weak-ass response.” My heart was breaking into a million pieces.
He shook his head and left, taking all my hopes and dreams with him.
How could he get me so worked up wanting him, only to leave me aching and throbbing?
This time I didn’t go after him. This time, I cried on my pillow. This time I knew Grayson Fox would never be mine.
6
Gillian
THE JULY DAY couldn’t have been more perfect. I’d totally missed palm trees, sunny days, and Southern California’s relaxed vibe. And Grayson. I couldn’t stay in the area for college because of him. I’d basically run away, hoping to get over him. It didn’t help.
Moving to a different town within the state wouldn’t have gone over well with my dad. Not when there were a ton of colleges to choose from in the Los Angeles area. If I wanted to go “away” to school, it had to be in another state to experience something different.
Seattle was it. Two states away.
I’d avoided coming home at Thanksgiving and Christmas. My dad and Billy were disappointed, but I just couldn’t. It was too soon. If I had any chance of getting over Grayson, I had to stay away.
It appeared a year still wasn’t enough time to forget him.
When my vacay with my girlfriends was postponed, I was secretly relieved. I wasn’t looking forward to drinking myself stupid and fighting off dudes trying to get into my pants. Or rather, bikini bottoms. I’d only agreed to go so I’d have another excuse for my dad as to why I wasn’t coming home.
Poor Averie though. My sweet friend’s appendix had ruptured, which canceled our month-long stay at her parents’ lake house in Vancouver. She said we’d reschedule, but I was honestly glad to not go.
When my dad found out the trip was off, he guilted me into coming home. He tugged on my heartstrings, telling me Billy would be home alone. Dad always knew how to play me like a fiddle.
But the truth was, I’d missed him and Billy more than I realized I would. After avoiding home all year, I couldn’t stay away anymore.
I also needed to seehim. Now I wished I’d never come home.
I’d only planned to see him from afar. No talking. Or laughing.Onlysee him. After that, I would’ve avoided Grayson Fox for the rest of my visit, so I could return to Seattle and hopefully put him out of my mind for good.
But Billy, the little booger, had changed all of that by calling Grayson when we were at the pool last weekend. I owed my brother big-time, despite my broken heart. Billy’s actions had forced Grayson and me to admit our feelings. I may have never known how he felt if it weren’t for Billy. What good it did me in the end. Grayson had left me wholly aroused Thursday.
I believed I’d never feel his lips or touch again.
This morning, I’d woken up throbbing for him. I’d felt Grayson’s lips and hands on me. Smelled him. Tasted him. It was the worst kind of torture. I was sure it had everything to do with seeing him today.
I searched the park for him as I was perched on the bench eating pancakes. Billy was across from me. My dad’s girlfriend, Laura, was beside me. It was the same scene that played out every year. Dad ran around the park doing his thing while I hung out with Billy… and now Laura.
“Was your freshman year everything you hoped it would be?”