1
Scarlett
THE FRIGID WATER in the Pacific Ocean numbed my emotions as I knew it would. I always froze my ass off, unlike in the Gulf of Mexico’s warm, soothing waters. Memories of vacations with my family in Florida tried to creep into my mind, but I cast them away. As much as I wanted to lose myself in something else, or escape from what today meant, I couldn’t.
And I hated it.
Santa Monica Beach was the first place Laney and I came to after Erin’s funeral. Our best friend had loved to surf and spent most of her available time catching waves. I felt her spirit as I bobbed up and down, licking the salty water off my lips. Or maybe I tasted the tears streaming down my face. I wasn’t sure which it was.
“I can’t believe she’s gone.” Laney sniffled.
I didn’t respond as I stared at my beautiful friend. Her blonde hair was up in a messy bun, her big brown eyes were sad, and her teeth chattered like mine.
Here today, gone tomorrow,played in my head like a broken record. When I was growing up, my mom used to say,When it’s your time to go, there’s no stopping it. Tomorrow isn’t promised.
My tears picked up and my heart seized in agony.Fucking drunk driver.
“We should do all the things she never got to do.”
I turned toward Laney and waited for her to continue.
“Erin would want us to experience life to the fullest. She wouldn’t want us crying over her.”
“It’s only been a week. Her funeral was just a couple of hours ago.”
“Still. She’d kick our asses for it if she could come back.”
“I would do anything to have her come back and beat the shit out of me.” I dunked my head back to wet my hair.
Laney snorted and went under the water. We were out far enough away from the shore to avoid the crowds and screaming little kids. With it being the middle of August, the beaches were packed. After Laney and I swam for a bit, we planned to go to the boardwalk and stuff our faces with fish and chips and clam chowder… Erin’s favorite. Then we’d ride the Ferris wheel and blow kisses up to our girl in heaven.
Jesus, my heart hurt.
I went under the water to submerge myself, wondering what it would be like to be dead. Was it like a candle’s flame suddenly going out? Was there really a heaven, like a pastor in my church back home used to talk about when I was a kid? Maybe I shouldn’t have stopped attending service after I graduated high school and went to college. Perhaps I should go back. It would please my mom and dad if I did. Every Sunday evening, when I called home, Mom would ask if I’d found a church yet. For the last six years, I’d been searching for a church and still hadn’t found one. She and I both knew I wasn’t looking.
When I moved from my hometown in Montana to Southern California for college, I wanted to make my own way, live my life the way I wanted without my strict Christian parents breathing down my neck. After getting my business degree—because they thought it was best—I never returned home. It was safe to assume we were a bit estranged after I moved away. It was also safe to assume I wasn’t working in a business capacity.
Nope, I taught dance during the day and was a server at Club Rendezvous in the evenings a few nights a week. Laney and I both worked there, while Erin was the breadwinner in our group as an accountant.
Dammit, we needed to get a new roommate. There was no way Laney and I could afford our townhouse on our own. I was sure we’d both pick up extra shifts at Club R. I didn’t like working there half as much as she did. For me, it was just a paycheck.
I shot up to the top of the water to tell Laney to post an ad. When our eyes connected, hers widened.
“Scar, look out!”
I was hit from behind and knocked forward into the water. My candle blew out. Everything went dark.
Suddenly my eyes flew open as I coughed. The sun was too bright, so I squinted, feeling the most fear I’d ever felt before. My heart raced and my body trembled. I was so cold.
“That’s it, get it all out,” a male voice said. He turned me on my side and rubbed my back, keeping another hand on my thigh. I caught a glimpse of one of those weird silver blanket things on me. But I still shivered.
“Don’t you ever scare the crap out of me again,” Laney cried, taking my hand. “I can’t lose both of my best friends.” She rubbed my hand between hers. Her eyes kept flicking to the person helping me.
I wanted to ask Laney what had happened, but I couldn’t stop coughing.
“Hey, give her a minute to catch her breath,” the man said from behind me in a stern voice. “Just focus on your breathing, Red. You’re going to be all right.” He continued rubbing my back, while his other gripped my thigh firmly. “When you’re ready, I’ll help you sit up.”
A crowd had formed around me on the beach. I could see the Ferris wheel off in the distance. Why was I lying on the sand? Then I remembered being in the water with Laney. I’d been underwater and popped up out of it like a fish. Laney had yelled for me to watch out, then I was hit in the back by something. Whatever it was, I never saw it coming.