“It is…I am not sure it is,” Felicity said softly. Taking a deep breath, she told them of the entire matter.
“Oh dear,” Theo said.
“I think it serves him right to be snared,” Lucinda said, her eyes twinkling. “I can see that you hold great affection for Wyndham, Felicity, or your heart would not be so disturbed about this small matter.”
“Is it a small matter?”
“You were not the one who deceived and pushed him toward an offer. He did that all on his own with no luring from yourself. If you feel so strongly about it, inform him after you’ve tied the knot.”
“Surely he will think that I lied to him!”
“But you did not,” Lucinda said, astonished.
Theo frowned. “An omission is just as grievous. I do understand your worry, and I think…If you are to trust in the connection between you both, you should tell him the truth. If he loves you, Felicity, he will marry you still.”
A jangled mess of emotions tore through her. “The earl is very against marriage. It is the reason I am pretending to be his fake fiancée in the first instance. Surely he would not go ahead unless he has a reason.”
Theo smiled. “That reason would be because he loves you.”
“But he has never told me so,” she cried, pressing a hand over her aching heart.
“Not all men are comfortable voicing sentiment, but surely he has shown that he cares?”
Unable to answer that, she peered down into her sherry. Perhaps the earl was kind and tender and just so wonderful with all his lovers.
“Sometimes we must do dubious things to secure the affections of those we admire,” Lucinda said, with a glare at the duchess.
Theo laughed. “You could ignore my suggestion. It is entirely up to you.”
Sensing her curious stare, Lucinda expounded with a sheepish smile. “There is a gentleman whom I have grown somewhat fond of. He is moving his pursuit at a snail’s pace, and our dear Theo has suggested I seduce the man at a particular house party by climbing into his bed.”
“You are a widow of great beauty,” the duchess said, an irresistible twinkle in her eyes. “I am certain you shall succeed.”
“You have only grown wickeder since marriage to that blasted duke!” Lucinda cried, but there was a decided twinkle in her eyes.
Felicity smiled, some of the doubt easing from her heart as the ladies’ bantering floated around her. This was what she had needed…their friendship, support, and their valued opinion. Though she had not come to a decision, some of the weight had been eased from her heart. She laughed and chatted with Theo and Lucinda for another hour before excusing herself.
Another thirty minutes later, Felicity arrived at the Dowager Duchess of Hartford’s townhouse in Russell Square, heartened to find her mother still awake and reading in the library. She flung herself into her mother’s arms and unburdened the entire matter to her.
“The earl wants to marry you?” her mother whispered after a fraught astonished pause. “Are you certain?”
“Yes. I…I know the earl has some affection for me, mama, but I do not think he would have made such an offer without the terrible pretense of his grandmother. I feel as if I am deceiving him to withhold the knowledge!”
Her mother blew out a gusty sigh. “But you fear that should you tell him before the wedding, he will walk away?”
Her belly went tight. “Yes,” she whispered.
“Do you love him?”
She dropped her face in her palms. “Yes. So much it hurts, mama.”
Her mother’s smile wobbled, and she took her hands between hers. “Then do not tell him.”
Felicity was so shocked she pulled her hands from hers. “Mama?”
“The knowledge would only create a rift between the earl and his grandmother. And he will perhaps be angry that you kept it from him for so long. What does speaking about it serve? He is willing to marryyou. That is what is important, Felicity. Lord Wyndham could have chosen anyone else from the ton. They would have happily dashed themselves at his feet, but he chose you. You will be a countess and I…” Her mother’s voice broke. “I would not go to bed each night with worry for your future heavy in my heart.”
She nodded mutely and hugged her mother, wondering why she still did not feel at ease. They spent several more minutes talking, and plans were made for Felicity to rest for a day and then she would return to Chancery Hall with her mother for the wedding.