“I am afraid of whoIam when I am with you.” Finally, she met his gaze. “When I am with you, I do not think about duty or responsibility or anyone’s expectations of me. I do not even think about the dreams I have long held in my heart. I only think about you…me…us, and that is rather frightening. What is this, Lucien? I…” she thrust a few tendrils behind her ears. “I must tell you this. There is a reason I am out this season. I am expected to marry an heir to a barony, a gentleman most suited to align my family with. I hate saying that as if connection is the only thing that matters to a marriage, but in this case…I…”
Ellie could say no more given that her throat burned with frustration and too many complex emotions.
Lucien’s silver eyes darkened, and he was still for several moments. “Are you already married? Or affianced?”
A knot formed in her throat. “No, of course not!”
He gently pinched her chin, but she felt the force of his personality covering her like a blanket. “Until you are married or affianced…then you are mine, Elle.”
Good heavens!That possessive drawl shocked Ellie to her toes, and she stared at him in mute astonishment. “I…what?”
“You heard me,” he said with a touch of arrogance. “You are not promised to any man until you are. So do not bring up this man’s name between us again. When he offers for you and you accept, then you can walk away from whatever this is, and I will not bother you.”
They held each other’s stare for several, long, silent moments. Ellie understood his words and while they unchained her from ever making a difficult choice, something inside of her shattered at the idea that this connection between them was only meant to be temporary. Lucien was here with her, knowing it would never be more, and accepting it because he wanted her.
“I suppose you are also mine?” she asked tremulously.
“I suspect I will always belong to you,” he murmured, leaning forward to brush his mouth against hers. “But that is my risk to take, hmm? I am not afraid to fall in love with you, Elle. I am not afraid even knowing I might long for you years after we have met and parted from each other. To experience you even for a day, it is worth it.”
“Please,” she gasped. “Do not say such things!”
“Why not?”
“Lucien!” Her heart was pounding so hard she felt faint. And also, on the verge of tears for she desperately wanted the things he said, to belong to him and for him to belong to her. “I…” Her throat closed over the words and an impossibly wicked grin curved his mouth.
He stood and assisted her up. “Let’s get you tided up and then you return discreetly outside.”
Nodding, she gave him her back, smiling. “You are proficient with fixing a lady’s hair.”
“Is that jealousy I hear, my sweet?”
She sniffed, cross with him and herself. His low laugh stirred warm sensations in her heart.
“I assure you my practice is with helping my sister with her hair. Before we could hire a maid for her, she had to make do with her brothers as her helpers, and the little minx knew how to act like a princess.”
Ellie laughed. “I cannot imagine it. Is she much younger?”
“Vi is two and twenty and a right hellion,” he said fondly, stepping away from Eleanor.
“I would like to meet her someday,” she said, turning to face him.
“Perhaps you shall,” he said enigmatically.
Clasping her hand in front, for a moment Ellie felt tongue-tied and ridiculously shy. Her gaze caught the sofa where he had just done such wicked things to her, and she blushed. “I bid you good night, Lucien.”
Ellie retreated with as much grace as possible, given her entire body now felt as if it burned. What would her sisters say if she were to reappear with such flushed cheeks.
“No goodbye kiss, Elle?” he murmured with rough amusement.
She froze with her hand on the latch. “Should I kiss you again tonight I might not leave this room.”
A whisper of breath against her nape had her closing her eyes. She had not felt him move. Yet now she could feel the wall of heat and masculine power behind her. Ellie turned and lifted her face to his.
“I wouldn’t allow you to stay, even if my teeth are aching with want.”
She laughed and some of her tension dissolved. “So your teeth are aching, is it?”
Her lashes fluttered when he brushed his lips over her nose.