Luca’s icy voice cuts through my fantasy, and I feel my stomach drop as I’m brought back to reality. Thisisa token of wealth, nothing more. The ring feels heavy on my hand as I let my palm rest on the table, the sunlight from the window sparkling off of it. This is Luca’s way of showing anyone who might threaten him that he owns me. That Sofia Ferretti, daughter of the late Giovanni Ferretti, is his bride. That he takes what he wants, and will do whatever he must to keep it.
I swallow hard. I want to rip the ring off and throw it across the room. Part of me wants to choose one of the others, simply because Idowant this one, and I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t want anything that this man chooses to give me. Certainly not something that could hold so much meaning.
But a part of me that I don’t want to examine too closely can’t bear to take it off.
Instead I hold it up again, smiling pleasantly at Luca as I turn to face him. “Yes,” I say simply. “This is the one I want.”
“Alright.” Luca turns to the jeweler. “That will be all, then. You can send me the bill. And box up the band,” he says, indicating the gold ring left in the slot on the tray.
“What about your band, Mr. Romano?”
“Just a plain yellow gold band to match will do. Five millimeters, nothing flashy.” Luca gives him a stiff nod. “Have it here by Friday. The ceremony will be Saturday afternoon.”
“Very good, Mr. Romano.”
The moment the jeweler is gone, Luca takes a seat, pushing the first stack of paperwork towards me.
“Sign,” he says curtly.
Sofia
Ican feel the weight of the ring like a brand as I pick up the pen, and I feel sick to my stomach. None of this is normal, or right. There was no proposal, no getting down on one knee, no question to answer. Luca didn’t even put the ring on my hand himself. Everything about this is stiff and formal, businesslike.
That’s good, though,I tell myself.The more detached this is, the easier it will be to deal with it.
I can’t help but feel that I’m losing something, though. I’d never been the kind of girl who dreamed about marriage and family, who pictured her wedding day in every detail. I’m still a virgin not because I was saving it for my future husband, but because I simply haven’t had the chance to lose it. I’ve hardly ever dated, and the few dates that I’ve gone on were with men who were far from being interesting or handsome or fascinating enough to make me want them. I hadn’t even really enjoyed the few clumsy kisses that I’d experienced.
Luca’s kiss, last night, was the first time I’d ever really felt what it was like to be truly kissed by someone who knew what they were doing. Not a sloppy attempt to smash our mouths together, or the sort of brief, bored kiss a guy gives you when he’s hoping you’ll hurry up and let him move to the next base. Luca had kissed me as if he wanted my mouth more than he wanted to breathe, as if he were hungry for me. There had been fire and passion in that kiss, and if just one kiss was like that, what would—
I press my lips together tightly as I look at the first page. I can’t let myself think about it. Not about Luca’s kiss, or the fact that this marriage means giving up any chance at love, ever, or the fact that I’m going to be stuck a virgin for the rest of my life.At least I’ll be alive,I tell myself, and in the end, that’s all there is to it.
“If you’re planning to read every page, we’re going to be here all day,” Luca says dryly.
“Are you suggesting I sign something that I haven’t read?”
Luca sighs, a sound that he seems to make around me more often than not. “That document is your agreement to marry me. In it, it states that you will remain married to me until one of us dies, albeit from natural causes or otherwise, and that you will not seek a divorce. If you attempt to separate from me, take up residence in an unapproved place, leave the city, state, or country without my permission, or file for divorce, you state that you understand that I can no longer guarantee your safety, nor will I attempt to safeguard your person in any way.”
“That’s a lot of fancy words to say that if I try to leave, you’ll let me die or have me killed.”
Luca’s jaw clenches. “Iwill never have you killed, Sofia. It’s not my belief that the Bratva pose so great a threat that your death is necessary. But Don Rossi and I have different ideas about some things. And I will not stick my own neck out to protect you if you insist on leaving.”
Hmm.I file that tidbit away for safekeeping. Luca has just unwittingly shown me a little of his own hand. So long as Rossi is the head of the Italian mafia, my life is forfeit if I leave Luca. But once Luca is Don—he’s just all but told me that he wouldn’t have me killed for leaving.
There’s still the Bratva to consider, of course. But if I plan carefully enough, and bide my time, it’s possible that I might one day be able to be free again.
“It also states that I agree to provide for all your material needs. Your housing, food, utilities, and other necessities will be paid for, and you will be given a monthly clothing and discretionary allowance,” Luca continues, not noticing the change in my demeanor. “As my wife, you’ll be expected to attend certain events with me. You’ll also be expected to perform certain functions—sit on the boards of a few charities, that kind of thing.” He pauses. “Are you following all of this?”
“Of course.” I smile pleasantly at him.
“As the wife of the future Don, and eventually the wife of the Don himself, you’ll be in a position of authority over the other mafia wives. They’ll come to you for advice and company.” Luca makes a face, then. “I don’t know what the hell you’ll have to offer them, honestly, but do your best.Everyonemust believe that this marriage is real, and that involves you playing your part to the fullest.”
I wince. I hadn’t thought that I’d have to make friends, or be a real part of this “family.” I’d assumed that I’d be able to hide away in my apartment, traveling when I could and amusing myself. It had honestly sounded like the only tolerable part of the deal. Now I’m finding out that I’m going to have to preside over this grotesque kingdom with Luca and pretend to like it, and my stomach turns over. I don’t want any part of this.
But I still don’t have any choice.
“Is there anything else?”
“For that document? Only that you understand that no children will come of this union, or be expected. If you should fall pregnant, the pregnancy will be terminated.” Luca smiles tightly. “But since one ofyourconditions is that I don’t touch you, I don’t think that will be an issue.”