“I try to be.”
“What made you get into the security business?” she asked, trying to get a hold of herself. The memory of that kiss was all-consuming.
He didn’t say anything for a minute. “Because of what happened to my wife. Had I known Becca’s life was in danger, I would have hired someone to protect her until I was set free. But by the time I figured things out--that Murdock and Karlis’s deaths hadn’t been an accident, and Becca might be next--it was too late. I was behind bars and unable to protect her.”
She could hear the pain in his voice and she understood the guilt he felt. For so long, she’d regretted not being at that convention with DeWalt. She had somehow convinced herself that if she’d been with him, he’d still be alive. After all, for years, she’d made it a point to question the ingredients in his food, making certain it was free of any nuts, before he’d taken the first bite.
And even though he’d notified the hotel of his allergy upon registration, she knew mistakes often happened. Still, she couldn’t help wondering if she could have made a difference, somehow. But now she knew that it wouldn’t have mattered. There’d been no mistake. DeWalt had been intentionally murdered.
Intrigued by what he’d told her so far, yet careful not to bring up bad memories for him, she asked, “Why were your brother and his wife killed?”
It took a while before he answered. “The bad cops had heard that Becca was fighting to get me a new trial. I honestly don’t think they were too worried at first…not until they found out she was being bankrolled by my half-brother, Murdock Connelly.”
He took a deep breath, obviously remembering the pain of that time. “Unlike my oldest half-brother Frazier, Murdock didn’t have a problem accepting me as Harold Connelly’s illegitimate child. While Frazier and his mother treated me horribly, Murdock did not. He reached out to me, befriended me and became the older brother I’d never had.”
“Good for him.”
“Yes, but his kindness to me was what got him killed, Lennox. Murdock was the one who gave Becca the money to hire a PI to reopen my case. The cops who’d framed me figured it would only be a matter of time before they were exposed. So they killed Murdock, thinking that would put an end to it. If Becca had no money, there’d be no new trial.” He shook his head. “They made it look as if Murdock and Karlis died in a house fire caused by faulty wiring.”
He paused a moment. “Unfortunately, their deaths didn’t affect Becca’s determination to get me a new trial. Murdock had given her more than enough upfront and the PI continued the investigation. They went after him, too. But because he was an ex-cop, he’d anticipated their move and had been ready when they tried running him off the road one night. He shot and killed one assailant and made the other one talk. The thug spilled his guts--hits had been ordered on Becca and Carson for that same night. They killed Becca. Luckily, Carson had had a last-minute change in plans that night. That alone saved her life.”
Lennox didn’t say anything—a lump had formed in her chest. “How did you do it?”
He took a quick glance over at her. “Do what?”
“How did you go on with your life, knowing what those dirty cops had cost you? They killed your whole family. How does someone move on after that?”
He released a deep sigh. “It wasn’t easy, trust me. There were times I wanted to put a bullet right through their hearts. But I had to accept the fact that nothing I could do would bring my family back. But at least those bastards got life without a chance of parole. Justice was served.”
She nodded. “But the pain of losing them must still hurt.”
“Yes, and then there’s the guilt I felt, that I had somehow had a part in their deaths.”
“You can’t blame yourself, Roland.”
“I did. For years.”
“What changed your mindset about it?” she asked.
He chuckled. “My niece Margo. She is definitely Murdock’s kid. Once she discovered I was her uncle, illegitimateor otherwise, she claimed me. And once Margo gets her hands on someone, she doesn’t let go.”
He released a deep sigh. “Frazier became Margo’s guardian when she lost her parents, but I felt I owed it to Murdock and Karlis to look out for her. So I did, though she never knew it.”
He paused again. “Frazier also suspected that faulty wiring hadn’t caused the fire that killed his brother and sister-in-law, so to keep Margo safe, he sent her to a secured all-girls school out of the country. She didn’t return until three years after the bad cops had been sent to jail.”
Just then, he exited off the interstate, checking the rearview mirror to make sure they weren’t being followed. Then he continued his story. “Although Margo didn’t know who I was, I made sure I was there when she graduated from high school and college. I even went to most of her soccer games. Frazier would often see me there, but never acknowledged my presence or existence.”
Lennox shifted in her seat to look at him, although his gaze was on the road. “Why didn’t Frazier tell her who you were?”
“He was still having a hard time accepting who I was, himself. That his father--the man he highly respected and adored—had an illegitimate child. That had knocked Harold Connelly off the pedestal Frazier had placed him on. And when Murdock died, things became worse. Although Murdock never told Frazier he had given Becca the money to get me a new trial, Frazier suspected as much, and blamed me for Murdock and Karlis’s deaths.”
She could see why guilt would have been a problem for him. “But it wasn’t your fault.”
“At the time, like Frazier, I thought it was. He totally believed his hatred toward me was justified.”
She didn’t say anything as she tried to absorb all he was telling her. “So what changed, Roland? I saw your brother at Joy and Stonewall’s wedding. The two of you appeared to get along there.”
“We do now. And to answer your question, once again, Margo happened. Like I told you, once she discovered I was her uncle, she pretty much demanded that Frazier and I get our act together and move on. She told us that she accepted us both as her uncles.”