“Yeah, me neither, really. I didn't invite her to that wedding, and I think it was the nail in my coffin.”
“Oh my God, see? I told you, Dad. You should have invited her.”
“Not helping.”
“Right, right. I'm sorry. So…does she feel like she wasn't important to you?”
“Yeah, I guess. Something like that.”
“Well, what are you going to do?
“I don't know,” I say heavily.
“It seems to me that she’s worth fighting for. I mean, I’ve never seen you like this before over a woman.”
I've never felt this way about a woman before. Not even my ex.
Fighting for Lexi would mean changing what we are. Were. Lexi wants more from me. Maybe a traditional relationship.
I liked to play sugar daddy because I enjoyed having the power over her—loved having her beholden to me. Without that power dynamic, would I feel the same about her? No. Not really. I don’t want a vanilla girlfriend and vanilla sex. I don't want another boring wife I never come home to.
Except Lexi would never be that.
Even without the sugar daddy arrangement, Lexi was the yin to my yang. She liked it the way I wanted to give it. She submitted when I dominated—not for my money, not for the apartment. No, she submitted because it turned her on. Just as much as it drove me crazy to demand her submission.
I blink with the realization. Maybe if I’d explained things in this light, she would have understood.
“You have to show her how much she means to you,” Janine advises. “Maybe you should propose or … something.”
“Lexi won't even take my calls or see me. I don't think she's open to a proposal.”
“Well, I’m just saying you should go get her back. Do whatever it takes.”
I stand up. Swank is still open, which means Lexi’s best friend Gina should be around. I tried with her before, but I’ll have to try harder. She knows where my girl is, and I need to get her back.
* * *
I sit at the bar and wait for Gina who had been promoted to working behind the bar instead of cocktail waitressing. Rather than come over, she sends one of the cocktail waitresses over to me with a Glen Livit, studiously avoiding my looks when I try to catch her eye.
I don’t care if I have to wait all night. The aggressive frustration I had the last time I tried to talk to her is now replaced by calm determination. I need to find Lexi, and Gina knows where she is. I'll figure out the right words to say to get her to open up.
It’s a sign of how loyal she is to her friend that she ignores me for an hour and a half, willing to put an end to my big tips. Willing to piss me off in an establishment where I pretty much rule the roost.
Finally, she makes the mistake of glancing at me, and I catch her gaze and motion her over. Her lips thin, but she comes over. “Another drink, Mr. Manghini?” she asks politely.
“Gina, hear me out. I fucked up with Lexi. I didn’t mean to hurt her, but I did.”
Some of Gina’s prickliness disappears. She’s paying attention. That’s the most I can ask for at this point.
“I would do anything and everything to make it up to her. I love her.”
That softens Gina completely. Her expression softens, and the stiffness leaves her chest.
“I think you know she cares about me, too. I’ll do whatever it takes to get her back—make whatever changes she wants. I know she told you not to tell me how to find her, but I am begging for your help right now. I can make her happy. And I won’t hurt her again. You have my word on that.”
Gina’s green eyes scan my face, warily. Then she shakes her head. “I can’t.” She pushes back from the bar.
“Wait!” I cover her hand with mine. “Please. Just give me a hint. Anything—I have to find her.”