Here we are. The whole dysfunctional family.
Please,I beg quietly.Don’t be an asshole tonight.
I hold my breath as Stepan sets plates in front of each of us. His motions are detached and professional, smooth and confident. As soon as he sits down, he gestures to the feast, inviting us to serve ourselves.
Karina lifts my plate. “I’ll serve you.”
I smile warmly. “Thanks, Karinka.”
Pavel’s head jerks up, and his frosted green eyes pierce me from across the table. While he doesn’t say anything, I notice how annoyance flickers across his pupils.
I try not to smile as I turn to Karina. “Have you been listening to the news?”
“Just long enough to gather what the cops are doing.”
I nod. “They’re probably chasing their tails.”
“They won’t be for long once we act,” Pavel cuts in. He raises his fork and stabs the tender meat on his plate, juices spilling down the tines as he raises it to his lips. “Half of them will be dead.”
I clench my teeth while reaching for a napkin. I tuck it into my collar. “They won’thaveto die if we clean out their ranks from within.”
“They’ll die in prison,” he retorts. “Stepan, pass the soy sauce.”
The whole dining room sounds as normal as it should, with the sounds of scraping utensils and squeaking chairs from weight adjustments. Yet the tension that crackles in the air outweighs it all.
Irritation rattles me as I suck air into my lungs. I manage to steady my voice from revealing my anger. “There’s a difference between actively killing people and them dying as a result of their own choices.”
“The system will take them either way,” Pavel argues. “It’s kill or be killed, Liya.”
Stepan lifts his head but doesn’t say anything.
I grimace. I can’t hide my anger anymore. “So you’d rather shoot first and ask questions later?”
He avoids eye contact with me and stays quiet.
“Let Berkowitz ask questions and sort things out from there,” I continue. “He can make Cardona look like a fool.”
“I can do that better than the DA.”
I drop my fork. “It’s not a good idea, Pavel.”
“It’s a contingency plan. We have to cover all bases.”
“Our bases will be covered once I can get the DA involved.” I set my fork down. “I just need you to trust me. Can you do that?”
Karina clears her throat politely and puts a reassuring hand on her brother’s arm. “It’s best to sit on these things, Pasha. Sometimes it’s better not to put all your eggs in one basket.” She looks at me. “That goes for us all.”
My anger diffuses slightly. I try to finish my dinner, feeling like I’m being watched the entire time. I probably am. And it’s probably Pavel.
After dinner, I retreat upstairs. I carry my head high. I don’t want to think about anything other than meeting Berkowitz at McDonald’s tomorrow.
There aren’t any other options. This is the only one that will work.
It’s like Pavel doesn’t trust me. I ascend the stairs and march to the bathroom, too agitated to care about closing the door behind me.Karina is right. He’s a stubborn jerk. Once he has an idea in his head, he’s relentless about it.
I study my reflection.
But am I any different?